You Fail At Having Time To Game If...

So here we are on the Tuesday after a long weekend glad that it isn't Monday, but then we also realize it is the start of the week. Now you may also realize that it is Tuesday so that means it is time for Fail Day! This week is all about not having time to game. So here goes

You Fail At Having Time To Game If...

• You just haven't been feeling well enough
• You haven't found a game to get into
• You misplaced your controller
• You have no one to play with
• You are on a gaming "break"
• You are preparing for an inevitable game grind
• Your PC needs an overhaul
• Your console died downloading a Day One Patch
• You believe playing Xbox is "real" gaming
• You thought you should study for those midterms
• You have spent too much time reading reviews for games and not enough playing them
• You had time to spend with Family this Thanksgiving
• You are looking into a game with a deep story and they seem to be few and far between

And Finally

• You have been busy watching the Blue Jays 

There you have it this week's edition of Fail. Hope you all enjoyed it or maybe even relate to if not well then so it is.

You Fail At Releasing Games If...

So it is Tuesday, and as you all know and are for, it is Fail Day. So it is time to poke fun normally at Gamers for things. Well today we are going after the developers because they fail a lot too. So why don't we just get to it.

You Fail At Releasing Games If...

• You never come up with a release date
• You are the developers of Half-Life 3
• You cave to your pushy community
• You ever worked on Duke Nukem Forever
• Your servers didn't work day one
• You think a world wide release will go off flawlessly
• You are trying to be fair to all players involved
• You don't have a digital copy of the game
• You have a patch every day for the first week
• You made promises you couldn't keep
• You are being looked into by the UK advertising board
• You have 90% of people returning your game week one

And Finally

• You think downloading a 55G first day patch is fair

There you have it this week's edition of fail. Hope you all enjoyed it and got something out of it in some way or another. You now have my permission to go back to whatever you are doing.

You Fail At Thinking Sports Games Are New If...

Fail Day! Yes here we are once again the day of the week where we sit back and enjoy the rest of the world's failures. So what are we talking about this week? Sports games and gamer;s thoughts about them.

You Fail At Thinking Sports Games Are New If...

• You don't think the biggest thing about them are roster updates
• You believe the hype every year
• You say it is not big deal when they removed something you liked
• You think full price for an update is worth it
• You think a feature is "new" when really they removed it 3 years ago
• You think the best thing about them is online with horrible servers
• You don't think it is a bad thing when each game doesn't have a competitor
• You don't understand why these games have the worst trade in value of any game
• You have no issue with the "we will fix it next year" attitude
• You enjoy dealing with the same bugs year after year

And Finally

• You don't believe anything I an saying

There you have it this week's edition of fail. Hope you all enjoyed it and you don't fall victim to the the fail.

You Failed At Predicting The Results Of Removing the Diablo III Auction House If

Fail Day! Yes here are here on yet another day where we get to be jerks talking about others failures. Something you may or may not be aware of 3 years ago almost to the day was when Blizzard announced they would be closing down the auction house for Diablo III. Obviously they didn't shut it down right away since people had a chance to adapt. With this in mind today is all about the people who failed at guessing what would go wrong with Diablo III when removing the auction house.

You Failed At Predicting The Results Of Removing the Diablo III Auction House If...

• You thought it would make Reaper of Souls a Failure
• You believed loot 2.0 would never work
• You thought everyone would miss trading
• You still think trading is one of the biggest draws of Diablo
• You didn't think anyone would be able to push top end content
• You thought it would kill the community and it would be a single player only game
• You believed gold would have no use
• You thought players gear in legendaries would never be the case
• You thought 3rd party sites would return
• You believe people wouldn't be playing end game
• You thought it would be impossible to gear followers
• You believed it would cause everyone to start playing Path of Exile

And Finally

• You are still hoping the Auction House comes back

There you have it this week's edition of fail. Hope you all enjoyed it in some way or another, and are able to look back and see the good.

You Fail At Being Ready For Machines Of War If...

Fail Day! Yes I am at it once again and there is no way to stop me. So what are people failing about this week? Well I thought I had not talked about Heroes of the Storm in awhile and plus with the new event starting what better time.

You Fail At Being Ready For Machines Of War If...

• You have no clue what I am talking about
• You didn't know this is a Starcraft themed event
• You are not ready to own it up with Alarak
• You have no idea who Alarak is
• You aren't going to take joy in killing SCVs at the start of the game
• You are one of those players who thinks nukes are dumb
• You don't like nukes
• You some how don't like nukes
• You don't think it is genius to have a Butcher Ultralisk skin
• You don't believe Rexxar could be part of Raynor's Raiders
• You are not wondering why Zarya is part of the this event and not Fenix
• You don't remember when Blizzard said they made Fenix, but chose at the time not to release him
• You think you can make an all Protoss team

And Finally

• You have no interest in playing

There you have it this week's edition of fail. Hope you all enjoyed it and maybe I will see you in the Nexus.

You Fail At Going Back To School If...

Fail Day! Yes it is Tuesday and following a long summer it is time for people to head back to school from everywhere. Now even though I have been out of school for quite some time now I still get this feeling on the day following Labour Day. On those days many things go through your mind besides school so here we go.

You Fail At Going Back To School If...

• You didn't finish getting to 110 beforehand
• You think you will still have time to get to 110 after
• You don't have a plan to complete your Hearthstone Dailies
• You didn't try all the big name games of the summer
• You have no witty comment about No Man's Sky
• You don't have a list of games you are getting in the next month
• You have not made a decision if you are getting the next NHL game
• You have more than 1 RPG currently uncompleted
• You have no reasons to  explain why you are going to get or not get the new Final Fantasy
• You have friends you avoided playing Call of Duty with all summer
• You are friends with people who play Call of Duty

And Finally

• You forgot you had school today

There you go this week's edition of fail, hope you all enjoyed it. For those going back to school enjoy for those who aren't well I know you are thinking about it.

You Fail At Being Ready For Legion If...

Fail Day, and not just any fail day. It is Legion Launch day. By the time you are reading this you are probably already leveling yourself up and just realizing that it is morning. These things happen don't they. So with that in mind there always is someone who isn't ready for something so let's get ready for it.

You Fail At Being Ready For Legion If...

• You didn't take part in any of the pre-expansion events
• You are wondeirng how everyone is playing a Demon Hunter
• You didn't setup your UI before launch
• You have no up to date addons
• You have not read over any of the skill changes
• You don't know what Order Halls are
• You have no idea who the Legion are
• You are wondering where Varian is
• You are also wondering where Vol'jin went
• You decided to main a Ret Pally this expansion
• You can't wait to see the new Garrison
• You are wondering where the Karazhan raid is

And Finally

• You have no intention of playing it

There you have it this week's edition of fail. Hope you all enjoyed it and are all enjoying your time with the new expansion.

You Fail At Hearthstone Adventures If...

Fail Day! Yes it is that time of the week again where we make sure everyone else knows why they are awful. This week it is going to be all about Hearthstone adventures. Well let's just get to it.

You Fail At Hearthstone Adventures If...

• You didn't know Hearthstone's newest adventure One Night in Karazhan just launched
• You were not aware you play cards against the bosses
• You think 700g is too hard to get
• You think adventures are just cash grabs and offer nothing else
• You complain you need a deck full of legendaries to beat the bosses
• You don't enjoy the comic relief from emoting the bosses
• You believe you should just be able to use the deck you always do
• You hate making gimmic decks
• You always lose and then bitch and complain on the forums
• You think all wings should be able to be unlocked without gold or money
• You have never completed a heroic boss because there is no point

And Finally

• You have never completed one

There you have it this week's edition of fail. Hope you all enjoyed it and even maybe learned something.

You Fail At Legion Pre Patch If...

Fail Day! Yes here we are again doing what we do best on Tuesdays. That being making sure when others know they are failing. So what is the topic this week you ask? Well the Legion Pre Patch stuff has been going on for a bit now so I thought it was time to check in with everyone with it. So here we go.

You Fail At The Legion Pre Patch If...

• You haven't taken part in any invasions
• You are not collecting Nethershards
• You have no pieces of the Fel armor
• You have not gotten yourself a Felbat pup
• You have not picked up any Fel weapons
• You have not activated additional dialogue from any of the demons
• You have not yet turned yourself into a dreadlord
• You haven't gone to Ulduar, Karazhan, or Dalaran
• You haven't used any of the secret vendors
• You have haven't started the Broken Shore questline
• You haven't completed either scenario 
• You have not seen the "deaths" that occur during the questlines ending cinematics

And Finally

• You haven't taken part

There you have it this week's edition of fail. Hope you all enjoyed it in some way or another and good luck with completely everything before launch.

You Fail At Being Ready For No Man's Sky If...

Fail Day! Yes it is that time of the week once again. Time when I bring out the French guy landing a vault in all of us. So what is the topic this week? Well No Man's Sky is out so it seems like a good idea to see what all of you actually know about it. So here goes

You Fail At Being Ready For No Man's Sky If...

• You were not aware it was available today
• You plan on exploring everything
• You have no interest in exploring space
• You are happy to show off to all those people who didn't have the game early
• You haven't thought of a variety of names for the unknown species and places you will find
• You watched all those exploit videos and are ready to use them
• You weren't aware of the day one patch
• Now you understand why the exploit comment was funny
• You are not curious of why it is called No Man's Sky
• You believe the game will be easily "beaten"
• You love when big companies make games like this

And Finally

• You Have absolutely no idea what I am talking about

There you have it this week's edition of Fail. Hope you all enjoyed it and got something out of it before you go exploring the outer reaches of space today. Go Luck!

You Fail At Knowing I am On Vacation If...

Well I'm back, and what a day to come back on everyone's favourite Fail Day. So coming from some of the emails I have been getting. I can conclude most people don't actually fully read all my posts. So here we go

You Fail At Knowing I am On Vacation If...

• You are still upset last week's fail day post didn't happen
• You sent me a total of 6 emails in 7 days. Yes 6
• Three of those emails where wondering if I got your other emails
• Another one of the emails was asking why I was ignoring you
• The last one was appologizing for the other emails that were sent
• You have already asked me my opinion on the new Hearthstone adventure
• You are wondering why I haven't logged on anywhere in the past week
• You wished me happy birthday, but still persisted to wonder where I was
• You can't get passed the fact someone can not log on to anything
• You have been spreading rumors of my death
• You think this post is me being replaced by an AI

And Finally

• You didn't even notice I was gone.

There you have it this week's edition of fail. Hope you all enjoyed it and survived my break.

You Failed At Garrison's If...

Fail Day! Yes here we are on yet another Fail Day. This fail day is a different though, because you cannot fail at this anymore so now it will be forever in the back of your mind. So here we go.

You Failed At Garrison's If...

• You figured you had more time
• Your entire game time was spent inside them
• You never finished the Garrison Campaign
• You never took advantage of the resources
• You didn't turn in the rest of your workorders
• You forgot to exchange all your mats for gold
• You didn't make your mission table part of your routine
• You never got any monuments
• You had a gathering profession
• You didn't get your jukebox toy
• You made a plan to rely on them in the future
• You are ever going to have gold problems

And Finally

• You don't want to burn it to the ground

There you have it this week's edition of fail. Hopefully you are not in this boat.

You Fail At Being Ready For Legion Pre-Patch If...

Fail Day! Yes it is Tuesday already, and all WoW fans are waiting for the highly anticipated expansion of Legion. What all WoW followers know though is before an expansion there is always a pre-expansion patch which sets you up for the expansion. So let's see how you could fail at it shall we?

You Fail At Being Ready For Legion Pre-Patch If...

• You have not pre downloaded it
• You believe all your addons will work correctly
• You don't know how some people are able to play demon hunters
• You haven't looked into the Broker Shore invasions
• You have no clue who the Burning Legion is
• You have decided not to look into your class changes
• You have no worries because your garrison gold will still be rolling in
• You are not excited about the revamped transmog system
• You are still working towards something in your PvP season
• You are wondering when the plague event starts
• You are not leveled to 100 yet for some reasons
• You have not renewed your subscription 

And Finally

• You have no idea what I am talking about

There you have it this week's edition of fail. Hope you all aren't failing too much.

You Fail At Difficult Bosses If...

Fail Day! Yes it is that time of the week once again. You know the time where you feel better about yourself, because others feel less of themselves for failing at something? Ahh yes, what a wonderful day. This week I decided to talk about difficult bosses. Why? Well recently have been playing the FFX-2 Remaster just to mess around. When I got to Trema and realized I couldn't use the Gunner Catnip trick to beat him. This made things much more difficult and gave me some motivation for this.

You Fail At Difficult Bosses If...

• You always play games on easy difficulty
• You keep trying a strat which is failing in hopes that it will some how work
• You believe fire gives haste
• You go through just as many controllers as you do attempts
• You don't blame random elements when you keep dying
• You can't feel your face getting red
• You believe life is fair
• You never try any optional bosses
• You are a button masher, clicker, or keyboard turner
• You give up and just say no-lifers do this kind of stuff
• You don't celebrate when you finally win

And Finally

• You just tell people you beat the boss even though you didn't do it anyway

There you have it this week's edition of Fail. Hope you all enjoyed it and all your rage will be better focused now.

You Fail At Grinding If...

Fail Day! Yes it is that time of the week once again where we get to make others feel worse so we can feel better. I know it is a beautiful thing isn't it? What is on tap this week? Well sometimes people play games and don't understand the whole concept of grinding. Well this is for them,

You Fail At Grinding If...

• You don't really play RPGs
• You are always undergeared
• You always are poor and end up begging
• You always check for real money ways to get ahead
• You have entitlement issues
• You don't get why you don't have pretty and shiny things
• You die repeatably on easy encounters
• You don't understand the concept of leveling
• You believe things can and always can be down your way
• You googled grinding upon reading this
• You just don't understand why you have to

And Finally

• You are never able to complete RPGs

There you have it. This week's edition of fail. Hope you all enjoyed it or maybe even learned something.

You Fail At Knowing What Happened At E3 If...

Fail Day! Yes it is that day of the week. It is actually the first Fail Day of the summer, well that is if you are joining me in the Northern Hemisphere, which if I am to believe the numbers to the blog it isn't always the case. E3 was last week hopefully you were aware of it. If not then this blog kind of explains itself. So let's take a look back and see how much you really took in.

You Fail At Knowing What Happened At E3 If...

• You didn't learn anything new about the VR market
• You are not in the least bit curious about the new Zelda game
• You didn't catch Prey is finally coming
• You did not like what you saw from "For Honor"
• You are not pumped for a new Skyrim
• You are not happy Norman Reedus is finally getting to be a main character in a game
• You missed the Playstation branding
• You didn't see EA is not against pumping their own tires
• You are not curious about the "new" God of War
• You didn't catch the Playstation Neo announcement
• You didn't think Battlefield 1 lost something
• You cared about any xbox announcements

And Finally

• You don't care in the least about E3

There you have it this week's edition of fail. Hope you all enjoyed it in some form or another. If not then oh well, you are probably morning Ramsay's death.

You Fail At Being Ready For E3 If...

Fail Day! Everyone's favourite day of the week. Still unsure how to feel about that after all these years, but it is what it is. You may also be aware that today is the first day of E3, and how could I pass that up for a Fail Day.

You Fail At Being Ready For E3 If...

• You had no idea it started today
• You don't like no random tech
• You don't believe any new games which are worthwhile will be announced
• You are interested in anything related to xbox
• You didn't watch any of the pre E3 press conferences
• You don't like watching new game trailers
• You don't like to see new IPs
• You are not excited to see what companies flop their announcements
• You don't remember the "used game" fisaco
• You don't have a checklist for HD remasters ready to check some off
• You are not looking for some news on VR developments

And Finally

• You have no idea what the three E's stand for

There you have it this week's edition of Fail. Hope you all enjoyed it, and are ready for all the fun and excitement to come.

You Fail At Streaming If...

Fail Day! Yes here we are again to celebrate our ability to make others feel worse. Yes, we are awful human beings, but at least we are enjoying ourselves. As always is the case with Fail Day I think long and hard about what my topics will be. This week it is all about streaming and those that just don't have it. So here goes.

You Fail At Streaming If...

• Your ability to entertain is surpassed by paint drying
• Your chat is always an arguement on why you are a sellout
• You plug sponsors or people who you want to sponsor you every half hour
• You celebrate a 12 hour stream as if it is a rare occourance for you
• You play retro games like they are new games
• Your connection cannot support an HD stream
• Your donations are based on how little of your skin is covered
• You try to copy other successful streams
• You can't remember the last time you played a game on your gaming stream
• You have a donation tracker that cannot even remember your last donation
• Your only subscriber is your mother
• Your mods need to moderate themselves

And Finally

• Everybody watching your stream is waiting for an "accident"

There you have it this week's edition of Fail. Hope you all enjoyed it and maybe just maybe those who need direction have a way of getting it.

You Fail At Gaming Controls If

Fail Day! Yes it is that time of the week once again where we get to feel better about ourselves because of someone else's misfortune. This week I decided to look how some controls in games just aren't meant for people.

You Fail At Gaming Controls If...

• You have trouble pressing X to Jason
• You don't know how to do a hadouken
• You can't hold mulltiple buttons at one time
• You look forward to one button fatalities
• You suck at maintaining cover and just run around aimlessly
• Positioning is overly complicated
• Your greatest gaming feats are done by button mashing
• You curse motion controls because they require physical effort
• You don't know any shortcut keys
• You think the xbox controller is the best one ever designed
• You don't know the "enter" button on any form of controller

And Finally

• You are a clicker or a keyboard turner

There you have it this week's edition of Fail. Hope you all enjoyed it and maybe just maybe learned something

You Fail At Being Ready For Overwatch If...

Tuesday, which means it is time for Fail Day to get itself on it's way. So what is in store for us today then? Well with Overwatch has officially come to us why not see who is ready and who isn't. So let's get to it.

You Fail At Being Ready For Overwatch If...

• You have been living under a rock and didn't know it was out today
• You have no idea what type of game it is
• You don't know any of the characters names
• You didn't play any of the beta
• You got it for xbox
• You have problems working as a team
• You are "that guy" on every team
• You can't recite at least one Tracer phrase
• Your choice of character is who looks the coolest
• You just keep going on an on how this is a shitty Team Fortress 2 clone

And Finally

• You don't plan on playing at all

There you have this week's edition of fail. Hope you all got something out of it in one way or another.