WoW Poetry?

Thought I would share this poem as everyone needs a laugh after once in awhile. Especially me with the pain of Sindragosa's voice ringing in my ears.

I'm jealous of every Felguard
Underneath the sun
I don't wish I had a Felguard pet, no
I wish that I WAS one.

Oh I wish I was a Felguard,
with bad teeth and spikey back
With a charge that doesn't miss
Whenever I attack

To be able to enter combat
With a bar full of blue rage
to start shooting off specials
the very moment I engage!

To wield a mighty 2H axe
without worry of the cost
A felguard isn't 'normalized'
so no rage there is lost

And to fight my foes half naked
without a speck of fear
Oh to be a felguard
un-dependent on gear!

Sure I'd be a warlocks slave
won't bother me in the least
No different than things are now
I'm shackled to a priest!

So Blizzard if you're listening
(Yeah right, we've no such luck)
I wish I was a Felguard
So then I could cease to suck.

Well there is also this random Pally Poem...

My comrades are my weapons, and I am their shield.
While I draw breath, they shall not perish.
So long as they live, our enemies will fall.
I am defender, protector, guardian.
I am a Paladin!

It needs work...

My comrades are douchebags, I am dps.
While I draw breath, they shall not get any heals from me.
So long as they live, I shall cop abuse.
I am dps, dps, dps.
I am a ret paladin!

Now that is much better!

Enjoy your Monday. If that is possible.

Ask Gauss

So it is Sunday and the weekend is about over, which is kind of depressing. Didn't help anymore so that it was a horrible day outside. What does this have to do with anything? Nothing I just didn't have a good way to intro the post today so figured this would work. Of course I just told you that was what I was doing so that ruined the whole thing. Whatever, let's just get to the questions.

So of all the things in the game what bothers you the most?

Well this is a pretty open question. I could choose something that bothers the crap out of me. For example why my backpack is only a 16 slot bag and I can't upgrade it. I think I curse about this everyday at least a few times. There is also the fact that none of the wrath weapon enchants have cool effects. I am guessing some people complained the effects in BC were too overdone. Well those people can kiss my ass. I want my berzerking enchant to look cool not like a beatslaying born again crap. Add to the list the turtle mount. I really think there is some GMs laughing at me somewhere. In addition PvP guilds and their need to write their guild names in all caps. Is there a story behind this or are they all retarded? The fact I can't just buy my gems with triumph and have to covert them all the way down. So I guess there are a lot of things that bug my everyday. This is also just off the top of my head. Wonder how many I could come up with after thinking about it.

Your favourite "bad" character in Warcraft Lore?

Well it is by far Deathwing, which is the reason I am pretty pumped for Cataclysm. He really is the classic fall from good grace bad guy. He also has one focus destroying everything, and can careless who or what gets in his way. Only a champ would smelt armor to his own skin.

Other "bad" characters I like which we have yet to see in WoW are.

Azshara: Most powerful wielder of magic
Neptulon: The water version of Ragnaros
Cho'gal: Gul'dan's apprentice and the one who resurrected C'thun
Sargeras: A titan gone bad. The evil of all evil basicaly. Most likely the last boss in WoW.

What can you not raid without?

Easy Dr. Pepper.

That is it for this week's questions. Be sure to send your questions along throughout the week. Next Friday's reader's post will be the topic of this week's first question. Tell me something that bugs you in this game, and of course why it does so.

Enjoy what is left of your weekend!

What Is That You're Wearing?

So yesterday I was chilling by my mailbox in Dalaran like I always do while answering my in game mails. Which were more than normal, but whatever that is not part of the story. Anyways, this was when I started to notice these alliance around me. All having me targeted. I was wearing my almost completed pally set. I am missing a shield, although using, at the moment, a Kara mace as an off-hand. I actually think it would be quite amusing to dual wield healing maces. So for like 10 maybe 15 minutes these alliance people keep coming and were obviously inspecting me. Of course I know I must be something to look at, but it seemed like something was going on. This was when an ally logged over and was telling me I was the current target of trade chat over there. They couldn't believe the gear I was wearing. Saying how could my guild let me have that gear? First off I didn't take any gear from anyone in my guild for the set. That would be pretty stupid if I did. The point of the set was to show how stupid using gearscore can be at times. Also I has become fun for me to stand or sit next to a holy pally I outgear. So even though my pally set isn't done yet, since this came up I will show it to you.

I was thinking of wear the best place to take screenshots would be when I decided that the birth place of the idea of the Paladin would be a good place for the birth place of the Holy Warrior. This being Northshire Abbey.

So yes unfinished but I have over 5300 Gearscore with a Kara Mace. Not bad at all. So meet the Holy Warrior. What you think dual wield or get myself a shield? Be sure to let me know what you think.

My Interwebs They DC

So it is Friday and time for this weeks Reader's Post. This week's topic was stories about disconnects. Could have been yours or someone you know. So let us all sit back and read about other people's misfortune.

Back when all the servers were running on hamsters that were over the hill. Our raid mass disconnected. The best part was when we all logged back on we were in Tauren Mill. How? I have absolutely no clue. So we just took our 40 man raid and owned the crap out of South Shore. Oh the good ole days.

The Zepplins on my server were acting up. Just as you are about to zone back in you get disconnected from the server. Normally we have been able to log back in just fine. Well tonight I was on my alt and this happened to me though I would go to log back in and I was getting stuck on the loading screen and before I could get into the game itself I would disconnect. This was going on for about an hour. A guildie was able to talk to a GM who reset my toon. When I was finally able to log back in, the GM had put me in Stormwind City. The bad part is that my alt is horde not alliance so I was killed almost instantly. Which the GM knew my race so I am convinced that the Stormwind placement was for their own pure amusement.

Our first kill of Magtheridon was an amusing one. Our tank kept disconnecting over and over and some how was able to maintain aggro through constant MDs. He would connect cast a few abilities then disconnect again. The whole time he was cursing on vent screaming, but it was like he was being beeped out because he was lagging out. It had to be on the funniest things ever in my wow career.

This one night in Naxx one of our hunters kept disconnecting and kept blaming it on his brother and whatever he was downloading. The funny thing was that we joked around and told him to tell his brother to stop downloading porn while you are raiding. The best part a couple disconnects later we actually heard him watching porn. He never heard the end of that one.

This story is actually about someone disconnecting we just made him think he was disconnecting from vent. We all pretended the whole night that we couldn't hear him. We just didn't acknowledge anything he said. "But I can hear you, I have no idea what is going on". He must have reinstalled vent at least 3 times before someone ruined it and told him it was a joke.

Because it was requested by a former guildie. I will post this. We were in Blackwing Lair and everyone knows the servers were special back then. I some how lived through the trash pull when everyone else died. I log back on to see corpses all over and myself staring at a Felguard. Of course everyone on vent is screaming at me to charge in and try to kill him. Remember this was a 40 man raid at level 60. There is no way I could kill it could I? Well watch the video someone took


That is it for today. Enjoy your weekend!

Points for Failures

So there is an achievement system so why not have points awarded for failures that people can be ashamed of? That would be great wouldn't it when people were applying to guilds. ?You could see how big of a dumbass said person is before you ever spoke with them. Obviously, this would never happen but if it were to here would be some of the points awarded in Icecrown Citadel.

Lord Marrowgar: Don't you love those people who don't kill bone spikes?
Lady Deathwhisper: All good fun aside, why kill a member of your raid?

Gunship: Sometimes I feel like I raid with 10 year olds

Deathbringer Saurfang: Do you really not see that blood beast beating on you? Or are you just tunnel visioned looking at the DPS meter?

Festergut: I have no idea how this is hard, but apparently it must be because people can't do it.

Rotface: Incomming giant slime. Looks interesting I should go say hello right?

Professor Putricide: So this Orange thing may me grow to twice my size and this beam is coming right at me. I swear some how it must make sense to run at this thing chasing me.

Blood Princes: Is a giant flaming ball that hard to see? Or did you have issues with Sarth's Firewall too?

Blood Queen: So all my buttons have changed to this bite command. I get this feeling I am supposed to do something I wonder what it could be.

Dreamwalker: So let me get this straight when he says "Everybody on that side has to switch to Skellies" he is talking to me too? Why was I never told.

Sindragosa: This is like the hallway in highschool all over again. I go to one side so do they. So I go to the other side, and so do they. It is like there should be this thing that once you get somewhere you should stay there...

Lich King: So wait a second that giant black stuff killing me is bad to stand in? Why was I not told this.

That is it for today. Maybe you have some fail points to hand out to people as well. I guess maybe isn't the right word. Reminder today is the last day to get in your disconnect stories for tomorrow's post. May your raid have less failure.

Lost In Translation

So I was just riding around on my hog pointlessly jumping around doing flips and spins while waiting for my Daily Heroic to pop. This is when I started thinking about how this would translate into real life. Then I had this brilliant Idea for today's post. So here are my thoughts

Daily Heroic = Going Out

Waiting for queue = wait for a ride
You running around Dalaran = You pacing around the house
You complaining how long DPS queues take = You texting or calling asking where the hell are they
The DPS that forgets to click accept = That friend who is always not ready regardless of how much time they had
Getting HoR and someone leaves = Getting to the bar and someone realizes they forget their ID
Bitching to the other party members that HoR is not hard = Calling them an idiot, who forgets their ID?
Requeue? = Go in without them or wait for them to come back first?

Free Loot Tuesday = Crazy Sale at Walmart

Pushing and shoving = 40 people on for 25 spots
Staff that never drops does drop = You spot the Bath mats your wife wanted
It goes to someone else = This crazy looking lady beats you to them
You beg them to give you the staff = You explain how badly you need said bath mats
You offer them gold for the staff = You open your wallet and ask "how much?"
They tell you another weapon drops later on = Them showing you a similar bath mat
"That staff is my BiS" = "You obviously have never met my wife"

The Gold Beggar = Squeegee Kid

Asks for change at your window = Walking around you asking for gold in /s
You say no, and he says he won't spend it on drugs = I only need it to respec
Light won't turn green and he won't leave = The tool opens trade with you
You roll up the window and he bangs on it screaming = Starts yelling for gold
Light turns green and you leave = You report him for spam

Decorating = Gemming and enchanting

no primer = no enchants
Didn't tape before painting = not best chants
Gifted furniture = gems you had in your bank
Ikea furniture = green gems
Ugly red couch that doesn't match anything = Completely wrong gems
Not stainless steal appliances = Meta isn't active

That's all I got for today try at doing your own. Reminder tomorrow is your last chance to get your disconnect stories in.

You Fail At Gearing Your Toon If..

Happy Fail day everyone. I find it ironic I do fail posts on Tuesdays since it is the reset day. Is this when I expect to see the highest amount of fail? From my laughs when I see what the weekly is and how some pugs will fail at it, to my enjoyment of people overpaying for everything on the auction house. This is an all trades fail and I would like to thank this DK in my daily heroic the other day that I wish I could have slapped upside the head for the inspiration. To the fail then.

You Fail At Gearing Your Toon If...

• You're a DK that thinks since spell penetration works in PvP, Spellpower must work in PvE
• You say no to upgrades because they don't match your current gear
• The phrase "those boots are cloth" is a reason someone else shouldn't have got loot
• You are using an item because it increases your gearscore regardless of the stats
• You got an upgrade because it was the only thing you could fill that slot with you could buy with badges
• Your gemming strat is based on what you had in your bank
• You are using two Bryntroll as a fury warrior
• You want an item with hit when you already have enough to hit a level 90 boss
• You think people are idiots for using ilevel 200 items because you are clueless to the fact they are actually good
• You have no idea what your soft and hard caps are for specific stats
• You have no clue why that should matter
• You have no clue why the guy about to join your pug is asking if there is an SP or a Battle Chicken
• You're a Ret pally who wants ArP gear
• You ask for help regarding gear choices from trade
• You're one of the hunters that has paid me 3500g for a gun used by a warrior tank

And finally

• You want to do all the optional bosses in a heroic because for some reason you still believe this is the quickest way to get more badges

That would be it for this week's edition of fail. Enjoy your Free Loot Tuesday that is unless you are extending your instance. Also I want to pre thank all the idiots buying my overpriced crap on the AH as I am typing this.

My Little Pony

So anyone heard about the pretty little horse you can get? It seems to be this topic has caused some serious uproar. Of course Blizzard is doing this to make money. Why do you think there is a pet store in the first place? The question of if $25 for a mount is a fair amount is not the point. They can charge whatever they want for it since they are selling it. If people are buying it, then it can't be that bad. I am sure they did extensive research on prices and all that crap to figure out the price. Wait I said I wasn't going to talk about that. Anyways, the question is, is selling this mount wrong? Of course not. Is it greedy? Some may take it that way, but really it is their company they can do what they want. If I started selling T-Shirts would I be greedy? People have asked for them and I am just doing what people have asked for. So I assume they have had millions of requests for mounts to be purchasable. They started out with the card game and I guess realized with the sale of many of those mounts on ebay they could make actual money off them.

So in a business sense it is like the decision to legalize things like alcohol, cigarettes, and marijuana. When governments realize they can make money off it they it is a completely different story. Why not get your cut right? No one is forcing you to get said mount. Do you feel you have to? If you have a problem with Blizzard selling mounts and pets you could always boycott WoW, but you won't you.

The question if I will get one. Well the mount looks cool. If you can get the my little pony vision out of your head. I probably wouldn't use it as a ground mount over my Hog. I just enjoy doing flips and spins too much, in addition to the killing people thing. Flying wise I really enjoy the if you have a 310% it goes 310%. This leads me to a bitch point. Why doesn't this apply to other mounts? I would love to ride a bunch of my mounts, but they aren't 310% so I am there wondering why I am going so damn slow. So there is my only real beef with the mount. The biggest reason I probably won't get the mount is because so many people have it. I am not one who enjoys to blend in, so I think it would be very anti-Gauss of me.

I hope that satisfies all the requests for a rant on "Sparkle" Blizzard's new addition to the My Little Pony family.

Ask Gauss

First off, I made a couple changes to the layout. Easier access to the email, which you can find to the right. Also a list of the WoW blogs I read is now also listed on the right without accessing to my profile. In addition there is now an easy way to suscribe via feed also located on the right near the bottom. Apparently, I made things quite difficult for people, so at least all the new people to the nation will have an easier time. If you have any requests as others have feel free to send them along. So back to the topic at hand. It is Sunday after all, which means it is time to reach into my bag of questions and choose three randomly that I will answer. By bag I mean email inbox, and by randomly I mean carefully chosen through a complicated process. So that leads us to the questions.

What is it like to just be standing around and people salute you?

Well they do things other than salute... I have gotten used to it. I guess it comes with the territory of being well known. There is always good and the bad. Apparently when you don't respond to whispers fast enough people assume you are to good for them. It is not that I have 30 other whispers also saying "hi" to me. Now to make a point I am not Monq. For those not a part of Llane, this is a guy or could be a girl for that matter, but I am assuming hes male. He enjoys chilling by the well by north bank in Dalaran on his frostwrym. He never goes afk and just sits there. My conclusion is he is there to be noticed and so his epeen can grow. Quite a special character. I actually thought Bliz made him part of the city. He is looking for what you are talking about. Maybe he will get it maybe he won't. So I guess to answer the question it is nice that people appreciate what you have or will do. I am just not the kind of guy that looks for it.

Why do you think people listen to what you have to say?

I guess you are asking why people would listen to me more than someone else. Maybe it is because people know me, or there was someone else I said something to that helped them out. I know a lot about this game because I have played it since it was released. This doesn't mean I know more than everyone, but I am well informed. It might also be I am very vocal and like to get the information out there. If someone is asking for something I know is not good for them. I generally will tell them they don't want that or need it. This in turn sparks a conversation and it just gets me going. Like the little gathering we had in Orgrimmar the other day. One thing got me going then 15 minutes later we have a crowd like I was making a public speech. People generally listen to someone if they have something to say. Of course I think everyone knows I pretty much have an opinion about everything.

How is the Pally set coming?

Just need a cloak, and shield. I'll post a pick when it's done.

So that is it for this weeks questions. Again if you got any other requests you want to see on the blog feel free to send them along. This weeks reader's post is going to be about those disconnect stories. Could be you or someone else you were with at the time. As always you have until Thursday to get them in.

Enjoy what is left of your weekend.

Right to Assembly

So yesterday in Orgrimmar I was driving around doing jumps, off the buildings with my hog, like I always do when waiting for raid time. When I started to chill for a second when I went to grab a drink. When I came back realizing that I didn't hide myself....

"Zomg you have the best gear I have ever seen!", "My gearscore is almost as high as yours", along with a series of others including "Gauss has 100k+ kills and no arena team". I answered it how I always do. For those who don't know I have been rather disappointed in Arena in Wrath. I spoke about how it is very now very pigeoned holed. Apparently I started to attract attention for this crowd started to form up around me.

Think of it like an Ask Gauss blog in real time. Talking about things from pvp, raiding, hardmodes, to the development of the games lore. This was when someone commented there was at least 40 people standing or sitting around listening.

Actually never really been a part of something like that in the game before. Well that is a bit of a lie I have had that many alliance stand around my corpse teabagging, posting banners, and of course spitting and laughing. So lets just say people who didn't want me dead were standing around. Well that is probably not completely true either. As some of them standing around were most likely planning my demise.

Anyways because of this maybe I will chill around more often in places where people actually assemble rather than in my hidden locations to avoid the masses. So if your around look for me and I will probably be speaking my mind somewhere for people to pick my brain and all that is Warcraft.

My Favourite Boss

There are hundreds of bosses in WoW as I know you are aware of. I also know that everyone has a favourite boss. It could be a boss that took you or your guild forever to take down, could be that it gave you a sense of accomplishment, or you could just like the encounter and enjoy doing it. This is what this weeks reader post is about. So let's see what everyone had to say.

Onyxia has a special place for me. It was the first major boss my guild killed. We were working on her for some time and through all the wipes and all the whelp deaths and of course all the quoting of that famous video we finally got her down. This was also the reason I was so happy that Blizzard decided to "redo" Onyxia for the 5th aniversary. Giving the raiders and others alike who didn't get to expierene her in her prime the chance to do so.

Sarth 3D to me is a great encounter, which really showed your guild had what it took be a top level guild. I am not talking about the joke now that is the nuke strat. I am talking about handling the drakes, cooldowns on the tanks, and DPS killing the adds and going in the portals. I truly great and well designed encounter.

I didn't play wow pre-WotLK, so my experience isn't as great as some. Anyway, my favorite boss would have to be Mimiron HM. Seriously, even on 10 man theres fire everywhere and it's just chaotic. From a dps standpoint in my opinion it's possibly the best way to accurately test someones dps potential, with all the moving and dodging and dpsing of adds.

Lady Vashj to me is one of the best designed encounters. Was difficult and required great execution. The fact is even now you can't just go in there and use your level 80 power to steam roll the encounter. You need to know the strat and how to handle the cores. They need to bring encounters back like this that required the entire raid to function as a unit.

Ragnaros is what start it all. He was the perfect balance between DPS, tanking, position, and add management. He was also my first major triumph in this game. I really hope when hes back they give him an encounter which does justice to his first encounter.

Illidan was it for me. The build up to fight him was just something epic in its own right. The first pull when he said "YOU ARE NOT PREPARED" made me really think we weren't prepared. We got our asses handed to us easily. We put in the work and got him down killing one the major WoW characters in history. Was great stuff and I won't ever forget it.

That is it for this week as there is a limit to the amount of stuff people will read. As always thank you for all the submissions and sure to check next weeks topic which will be stated on Sunday. Enjoy your weekend!

Some Bosses Make Me Wonder

So you ever wonder what the hell some bosses were thinking? Why did they do exactly what they did? Are they really that stupid? Hey maybe all bosses were ret pallys in another life. So here is some of my thoughts on why some bosses are not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

Malygos: Ever wonder why Maly lets everyone come in one by one and doesn't kill them. Like if he doesn't want anyone in his little haven why even have a platform for them to land on in the first place. Like them fall to their death. Also he like bitches and complains about how he can own you while just flying around you, but they straw that sets him off is when you touch his little crystal ball. What is his thinking? OMFG YOU TOUCHED MY CRYSTAL BALL NOW YOU DIE!

Yogg Saron: So for an Old God he is pretty retarded. He has this immunity bubble on him so you can't hurt him, but for some unknown reason he ports you inside his brain so you can kill him. Does this confuse anyone else? Or should we just blame Yogg for his own death?

Anub'arak: So why doesn't he he stay underground so he doesn't die? Like lets just let people beat on me like and idiot then I will chill underground after a bit. Why not tunnel yourself and retreat at least to save your life. Obviously there is a reason he got kill and is a servant in undeath in the first place.

now for the the master

Lich King

• He has tunnels through all of Northrend and just waits for them to attack
• He lets people walk right into his Citadel. Why doesn't he send Sindragosa down to kill everyone?
• You know during the first Quest for Shadowmorne and he summons like 1000000 ghouls. Why does he not summon that many you fight him, instead of the 5 at a time?
• Why does he Iceblock Tiron and not send him over the edge
• Speaking of Iceblocks why doesn't he Iceblock healers so the tanks die?
• You know that spell at the end of the Deathknight questline Apocalpse why doesn't he ever cast that. It like owned every ones face then.

So I have come to this conclusion does anyone else know someting that bosses do that just makes you scratch your head? Last reminder that tonight is the last day to get your story about your favourite boss in.

You Have To Be Kidding Me

So the Pally preview was today for all those that didn't know. Blizzard always leaves paladins to last since I think it is more than 30% of characters in WoW are paladins. So they have to get the QQ and short bus preped and warmed up. Getting ready to read the changes I almost expected something completely ridiculous, and I wasn't disappointed.

Guardian of Ancient Kings (level 85): Summons a temporary guardian that looks like a winged creature of light armed with a sword. The visual is similar to that of the Resurrection spell used by the paladin in Warcraft III. The guardian has a different effect depending on the talent spec of the paladin. For Holy paladins, the guardian heals the most wounded ally in the area. For Protection paladins, the guardian absorbs some incoming damage. For Retribution paladins, it damages an enemy, similar to the death knight Gargoyle or the Nibelung staff. 3-minute cooldown. 30-second duration.

Now think about all the previews we have read about. Done? Now read that again. Now does this sound as insane as I am thinking it does? Maybe it is my eternal hatred for paladins or maybe it's not. I would love to have a spell or ability that works differently depending on what spec I was at the time. This would be like army of the dead healing a target, or something less stupid as Whirlwind knocking down a target when spec'd prot. Now that sounds insane and completely Overpowered. Now go back and read the cooldown and how long it lasts, now it sounds even more ridiculous.

At least this guy is happy

Just a reminder tomorrow is your last day to get your stories in about your favourite boss for this Friday's reader post. May your boss pulls be 100% worthwhile.

You Fail At Boss Tactics If...

So it would be Tuesday in case you didn't know, which means it is the time for the weekly addition of fail. I had a lot of ammo for the post this week so I am sure to get someone you know with some of these.

You Fail At Boss Tactics If...

• Your ability to run 20yrds in 5 seconds if non existent
• Distance frames appear to be in a different language
• You conveniently dc whenever you screw up
• The concept of the middle of the room causing confusion
• You interpret "melee stay the fuck away till a target is chosen" as "beat on the thing while you blow up the raid"
• When you are targeted for an icetomb you want to share this experience with the entire raid
• LoS some how means die like a champ
• You think dragons don't cleave or tail swipe.
• The word "stack" means be as far away as possible so you get no heals
• "Stop DPS" means blow all cooldowns so I have awesome numbers on the damage meter
• Don't go on platform means run up on it to target the boss like a pro
• You think purple flames are finally the flames that give you haste
• You think staying spread out is only a guideline
• Bloodlust after next portal means Bloodlust now
• You caused a raid wipe or almost did then complain like a 8 year old when asked to step out
• You think decurse means everyone but you

and finally

• Your tactics on a boss fight cause people to hearthing during pulls

That is it for this week. Enjoy your free loot Tuesday unless that is if you are extending of course!

WTS

So with my guild getting pretty geared up and these BoEs deciding to drop like flies now I am having to sell a lot of these Icecrown Citadel epics. There are three kinds of people who whisper me about these. People who actually want to buy them, lets call them Buyers, people who try to get it cheaper than what I am asking, lets call them Wasters of Time, and finally people that I well just refer to as Failures. Let's go over each type shall we.

Buyers

These people are the ones that whisper you ask the price, understand it is fair and either make arrangements to get the item now or say they need an hour or two to get the gold together. People like this I don't mind because they understand how things work. I have a price and that's what I will be getting. They don't bug me and ask to get it cheaper. These are the people I wish I would see more of.

Wasters of Time

These are the people when they ask you the price and say 8k they respond back and say how about 5k. You say "no", and they reply "well I only have 5k". I respond "Well that's nice". They come back and say "Well I don't have 8k". I reply "Well then you wont get this wont you?". They go on to complain I am being unfair. Apparently I can't make my own prices and if someone only has a certain amount of gold it is rude of me to ask for more. How dare I? These people just piss me off because I know some of the times they have the amount I asked for and just want it for cheaper. Maybe sometimes they don't have it, but that doesn't mean I am going to be "nice" and take less gold then I can get because you are a dumbass and spent your gold on something else. Like I said before "Wasters of Time"

Failures

These are the people that have the gold, but they are asking to buy an item they have no business doing so. Like a Hunter that is all excited because I have a gun upgrade for them. What they fail to notice is that it is a tank gun. This is where I am torn. Do I tell them that it is a tank gun? And if the answer is yes, do I wait till after they buy it from me? Or does it depend if I am in a good mood that day or not. I guess it would matter if WoW had an ethics board...

So this is the pain I must now go through with ICC epics. Anyone else experience this joy on a daily basis?

Ask Gauss

So it is Sunday and besides the last day of The Masters it is time for Ask Gauss. This week has kinda been crazy so many requests for blog posts and of course the "have you done a fail post on ___ yet". I got through all the emails this week even the weird ones, did you know they have wow in Nigeria? Anyways let's get to the questions for the week.

Do you think encounters are easier than they used to be?

Well if we are talking about normal encounters based to previous expansions I would have to say yes for the reason there was no hard modes before. But even considering hardmodes lets think about this.

In classic WoW think of the hardest encounters. Ragnaros was the first difficult encounter people faced basically because it was the first encounter people had to be organized. Know where to stand, not stand next to others, and of course assist for proper dpsing down of the adds. Nefarian was probably the first of WoW's truly difficult encounters. It wasn't just about how fast you could dps, or how good your healers were. Was about position, kill targets, and raid management. C'thun by many is considered to be one of the most difficult encounters WoW has ever had. In my opinion this isn't close to being given this title. This encounter was hard because 40 people were in the raid not because of the mechanics.

The Burning Crusade in my opinion saw WoWs most difficult encounters, and blizzard has said an instance at the level of Sunwell won't be made again. In BC it was not unheard of to spend weeks or a month trying to get a boss down. Individual boss kills were more of an achievement rather than now the big deal is clearing the instance. When you think of the names and what went into killing Vashj, Kael'thas, Archimonde, Illidan. All of these bosses could be considered guild killers. Any raider who expierenced it though all you have to say to them is... M'uru. They have never made anything more difficult.

So comparing Wrath 3D sarth on release, Yogg +0, Algalon, Heroic Anub are at the difficult level. I don't think anyone could say any of those bosses is more difficult then completely Sunwell. So I do think the encounters are easier, but I enjoy the new designs a lot more than I used to. It is not the same boss with a different look, which to me is important and makes the game worth playing.

What addons you currently use, what you love, like, hate but use, wouldn't touch with a 50-foot Molson's?

Here is my list
Auctioneer
Bagone (when will blizzard put this option in...)
Bartender4
BloodQueen
Boss Notes
Cooldown Count
cycircled
Deadly Boss Mods
eePanels
Elkano Buff Bars
ForteXorcist
FuBar
Grid
Omen
OmniCC
oRA3
Postal
Prat
Rating Buster
Recount (I hate running a meter...)
Scrolling Combat Text (would love to run blizzards, but so used to this)
SexyMap
Shadowed UnitFrames (this is the new agunit)
Slam Alert
Strong Arms
Tankpoints
WTFrames

Now addons I would stay away from xPearl(takes too much rescources for what it does), titanpannel, CT_Mail, AuctionAdvanced, Dominos(doesn't get updated enough), CTBuff, DrDmg.

Now there are some addons which do the same of many of mine I just haven't used them and can't speak about them. Also for those wondering since it seems I use a lot. In a raid I do not run auctioneer and run at about 21M of memory.

So you are always answering peoples questions, so here is your chance to ask me a question.

Why is the rum gone?

That is it for this week. Enjoy what is left of your weekend. This Friday's readers post will be the story of your favourite boss and why. You have until Thursday night to get them in.

Like A Boss

So I had this idea if I was a boss in WoW what would the encounter be like. I am pretty sure I would want it to be able my frustrations that people have done over the years. So here goes my release!

Abilities

Banishment of the Slacker: Right on pull I would instantly kill the person who got back last and held everyone up. Saying something "Run back now you damn slacker, and don't bother repairing like you do after every stupid pull".

Punishment of Failure: Scream "Who heals and who fails?". Upon finishing throws all ret pallys across the room and gives them a movement speed debuff. Therefore by the time they get back to the boss they are thrown back once again.

Incompetence: While there are spots of fire all over the room if you stand in one for more than 2 ticks you will be frozen in spot have a giant arrow on your head and laughed at while you die to the fire.

Test of Idiocy: You are marked for a challenge you must turn and run to the other side of the room. If you do not make it in time you will explode and instantly kill anyone within 100 yrds of you. This feat can only be accomplished if you fail and keyboard turn.

Stack of Power: One random person is marked. Everyone must stack on this person to either heal or DPS. Not close to them, but directly on top.

That's What Friends Are For: When this casts anyone within 10yrds of anyone else is killed. Spread out you have no friends.

Deadly Barrier: Throw up a barrier that when any DPS is done after it has gone up the person is instantly killed. ie STOP DPS. If you die to this ability "Stupidity has no Cooldown" is spoken.

That is all I can think of for now that I could actually turn into something. If you think of something else be sure to tell me. Enjoy the weather and your weekend.

I RP Therefore I Am

So today is Friday meaning it is time for this weeks reader's post. This week I asked people what they wear for RP gear and a little story to go with it. People may not know that I have quite a few RP outfits that I keep in my bags at all times. I have a Wizard outfit, Pally set, Rogue Set, Biker Set. Not to mention keep all the holiday stuff along with a 9/9 twill set. This seems to be rubbing off on people, since Mora started a dancing club in Orgrimmar the other day, in addition she started collecting dresses, outfits for fishing along with who else knows. All is well! Join the fun if you don't have one. So here are some of this week's submissions.

I have a Jedi set with light sabres and all. I get complements on it all the time. I even added emotes to my attacks talking about the force. If only people knew I paid like 3k each for the swords.

Twill is where it's at. You look like a pimp. I always use it to fish. Reminds me of this time in Wintergrasp this guy stopped killing me when he noticed I was in full twill. So there you go. Don't want to get ganked while fishing in WG just wear full twill it is like instant l33tness.

As a Draenei I have a construction worker hat with a pink shirt and jeans. I look just like the guy from the Village People when i do the Draenei dance. I can't take all the credit I saw it in a Never Stay Tuned Video.

Whenever I ride my Zulan Tiger mount I also wear a brawler harness and the greatsword you can buy from the vendor in Orgrimmar. Then I mount and hell "BY THE POWER OF GREYSKULL" so pro if only the tiger was green.

I have a hooker outfit for when I ask for gold. Have you ever seen the black leggings you can get not to mention the fishnet armbands. Don't underestimate the power you have over teenage boys!

I have 4 different Pirate outfits depending on how I want to blend in. I have all the pirate hats and the swashbucker shirts and of course the pirates. People sometimes confuse me with NPCs in Booty Bay it is pretty funny.

That is it for this week. Thanks to Mora for giving me the idea for this. Have a great weekend, last weekend of the NHL season!

The Warrior Preview

So I play a warrior and I am going to only talk about warrior changes. This is unless they come up with something completely retarded for another class that just has to be said. Mark the pally's preview on the calender I just have a feeling.

First off the rage normalization. They tried this in BC and it failed hardcore. It caused everyone to be rage starved and was just stupid. They are telling us now that it will work how they intended it to before. If it does work then it will be good, because honestly no one likes having no rage at low gear level then basically infinite all the time at high gear levels.

New Abilities

Inner Rage: This is basically a bonus when you reach 100 rage. Passive ability that increases damage. I like it.

Gushing Wound: Boss or player moves they get hurt more is what it comes down to. PvE wise only useful on fights where the boss ends up moving a lot. You are not going to ask your tank to move the boss so you get more damage. The PvP application I believe this is Blizzard's answer to the being able to kite a warrior problem. Because now the player running away from you will take more damage the more they move.

Heroic Leap: So apparently Wrath Beta was merely a setback... Yes this move was on the table in a different light in Wrath beta. Was a targetable jump to an area asigned by the warrior then. It was basically allowing people to jump places you weren't supposed to go so it was scrapped. Now it can be done by targetting a player and will cause a thunderclap effect. In my opinion this is now just a fancy charge, and was much better in the previous form even if all the people are like "OMG WE CAN JUMP AROUND"

Mechanics

• Heroic strike is now on the GC and is an instant attack. Still meant to be a rage dump.
• Shouts don't cost rage, but will generate them. They will work more like DKs horns
• Whirlwind can hit unlimited targets, but the damage has been reduced to 50% weapon damage
• Mortal Strikes healing debuff will be now 20%, but this will be done to all healing reducing abilities
• Sunder will be 3 stacks instead of 5, but still be 4% per stack.

New Interesting Talents

• The new Arms talent called Disarming Nature will make successful disarms cause the target to cower in fear for 5/10 seconds.
• Single-Minded Fury that is parallel to Titan's Grip and will provide a large boost to the damage of a pair of one-handed weapons.

Mastery Talent Tree Bonus

Arms
Melee Damage
Armor Penetration
Bonus Swing

Bonus Swing: This is similar to the Sword Specialization talent that is currently in the game, but Bonus Swing will work on all attacks and with all weapons. You have a chance to proc a free, instant weapon swing that hits for 50% damage.

Fury
Melee Damage
Melee Haste
Enrage Intensity

Enrage Intensity: Every benefit of being enraged is increased. This includes doing more damage/healing/ etc. from abilities like Bloodrage, Death Wish, Enrage, Berserker Rage, and Enraged Regeneration.

Protection
Damage Reduction
Vengeance
Critical Block Chance

Critical Block Chance: As we mentioned in the stat changes preview, block rating is changing to a chance to block 30% of a melee swing's damage. Protection warriors have a chance that the block will be a critical block and block for 60% of a melee swing's damage instead. There will likely be talents available to push the amount blocked even higher.

Vengeance: This had a huge explanation basically tanks damage will increase as their HP increases. The point of this is so threat doesn't plateau when DPS increases exponentially.

So that was it for the warrior preview. I like for the most part and like always don't go nuts because everything is not done and their will be more to come. So just breathe. For full information on all classes including warriors go here. Final reminder today is your last day to get your RP outfits and stories into me for tomorrow's post.

Do Other Servers Have A Gauss?

Now this isn't a post to make me feel awesome. It is a real question. If I randomly log on to another server is there someone who is pretty much known by everyone for one reason or another? Is there someone who can basically drive people insane with a click of a button? Why the question, you ask? Well let me tell you a story.

So I joined this VoA pug and the following happened. 4 people say something simlar to "OMFG it's Gauss awesome this group kicks ass". Someone else says "if Gauss is here I am not coming so make your choice!" Guildies say "calm down you can get his autograph later". Then the whispers start asking me question upon question. This all just made me laugh and wonder how this all happened. Well I kind of know how it all happened. It just made me think of other servers and if there is someone like me there. Would be great to talk to them share some crazy stories and have some good laughs. Think it would be a lot of fun. Who knows, eh?

I thought I would throw these two pics a couple people sent me for fun. I am sure they will give you all a laugh too.
That is it for today. If you know someone be sure to tell me. Reminder tomorrow is the last day to get in your RP outfits and your story behind them. A couple have made me /facepalm so looking forward to getting some more.

You Fail At Addons If...

So it is Tuesday and besides Free Loot it means it is time for the weekly fail. I still find it amusing Tuesday's are my most popular blog days. Wonder if this is because it is fail day or if it is because of down time. Or maybe both? Regardless, time to give you all what you came to see!

You Fail At Addons If...

• When someone says "Omen" you mistake it for "Oh Man"
• You answer your in game mails one at a time
• You don't use any raid frame and that includes the default UI
• You think DBM is short for Damn Bowel Movements
• You doing anything on the AH without Auctioneer
• You open your bags individually instead of having a ong bag mod
• You never update them and wonder why you are lagging and crashing
• You respond to raid whispers telling you to get out of fire, green shit, or bite someone
• The question "why I need a range frame?" has ever left your mouth
• You thought someone on vent was always yelling "runaway little girl"
• You call big brother a liar because I DIDN'T BREAK THAT SHEEP
• You don't use a decurse mod if you are a decursing class
• You set the mod "Auto Vendor" at epic threshold
• You are a pally without pally power
• After a patch you forget to click on the "load out of date addons" when you log in
• You use Curse and not WoWace

and finally

• You have no idea what I am talking about.

That is it! May your Free Loot Tuesday not be filled with shards and other useless crap no one wants besides that idiot who will equipped anything.

O Where O Where Can The Warlock Be?

So I don't know about other guilds, but with my guild warlocks have always been an issue. It doesn't matter what it is, but it is always something. Here are just a couple examples of warlock craziness.

• This one warlock thought I was purposely telling other warlocks to screw up so he would look bad. He left the guild after having a fit.
• Another warlock took it personally that he wasn't getting focus magic. He then transferred servers because we weren't letting him get to his full potential
• I swear without an hesitation we had a warlock who cut himself when he wasn't top DPS
• This one warlock had to say she was a lesbian in pretty much every sentence she ever said or typed
• First one dead last one back. Every time without fail. Apparently warlocks have a slow debuff while dead

These are just a few examples. This leads me to this current warlock we just recruited. Seemed like a good guy. His experience checked out. Has had many feats of strength for realm firsts. Even if he was a faction transfer a warlock is a warlock. He answered my plethora of questions without running away, and even took my warlock jokes in strides.

He was also excited to attend the raid Wednesday night. He was not saved to any raids and was ready to show us what he could do. Frankly, I thought I finally had found a sane warlock. Now truth be told I have said this before upon getting warlocks, to which I have changed my mind upon spending time around them.

So what is the problem you ask? Well he hasn't been on since that Wednesday afternoon. Haven't heard from him. The thing is before we did this interview I had hardly seen him offline. He never said he was going anywhere and like I said he was pretty pumped to be able to attend the raid Wednesday night. So I say Where O Where can the warlock be?

Just when I thought warlocks could be normal...

Ask Gauss

Well it is Easter and it's Sunday so that means it is time for some Ask Gauss. Been an interesting week and I apologize for my slow response to emails this week. I'll get back to my 1 day rule this coming week. If I don't be sure to give me crap for it. Anyways let's get to the questions

Do you think with the stat changes and how they work in Cataclysm will make the game too easy?

First off changing the way stats work isn't going to make you have more skill. Sure it will make figuring out things easier, but let's be honest. At the moment you can go to any site that knows anything worth a damn and figure this out. You can download spreadsheets, rawr, tankpoints, or ratingbuster. All of these things have been doing a lot of the work for you. So will the stat changes make you as better player? Basically only if you were completely retarded in the first place. I am liking how they are letting you somewhat change your equipment, which will lead to some interesting character choices. Let me also say something else about this. WoW is not a hard game to play. This is why it is so popular you don't need to be amazing to play it. To play it well maybe, but to get through much of it you can be just an ok player. If WoW was as hard as say Demon Souls I think the player base would be a lot smaller then the talk of making it easier would have much more of an impact.

Where do you think are some of the best visual spots in WoW?

Well this is a matter of opinion, but zone wise I tend to think the best looking zones are Mulgore, Nagrand, and Howling Fjord. Now that is zone wise. I thinking my header screen from Newman's Landing is quite a place to look out into the ocean. Also the Twin Colossal out in Feralas gives a great view. Storm peaks has so great views up by Ulduar and just flying in the mountains. I would also include instances in this. Ulduar is great for, and in my opinion the Algalon encounter is home to the best views in all of WoW even if you can avoid the seizures.
What would you say to me if I died like an idiot on trash in ICC?

LOLOMGWTGDAIRYQUEEN, LOLOMGBBTHEQ

So that is it for this week. Friday's reader posts will be about your RP outfits and the story behind them. As a last note as requested I put the most popular labels on the side for quick reference. Hopefully it makes finding posts easier.

Whirlwinder Roast

So Whirl has been bugging me for a long time to do a post centred around him. So maybe he spawned something new. Let's give it a go. If you liked what I did here there will be plenty of roasts in the future. Just give me idea on who to do it on.

So first off for those who don't know Whirl is a female troll. Well at least he is today he is... Some people might call him some what of a wow tranny. You see he has at least race and sex changed at least 14 times in the past 2 months. The sad part that isn't a joke..

When I log on and he says hello it makes me think of Forest Gump waving from his boat. Not to mention when I say die in a fire I think of him jumping off the boat while it crashes into the dock.

Even if his wife's name isn't Jenny if I ever met her that's what I would call her.

Speaking of that scene with him jumping off the boat. Is it just a guy on a boat thing with you jumping off the docks every time with For The Horde.

He's also from the east coast meaning I think I could yell at him for hours and he would offer me a lobster and a Kieths regardless of what I said.

Wait shaman healing is hard. Where the hell is my chain heal button.

I also love how he never admits to dying even when I can see his reincarnation is down with ora.

Did I mention I was able to kill him 4 times the same night on my bike in a span of 15 minutes. He just kept getting back on..and dying...

Nice PvP braces why you wearing those? Oh ya you deleted your BiS ones!

At least he doesn't ask me to play his DK. It's his damn mage

I could lie about his taste in music, but everyone saw you play Barbie Girl on vent...

Don't worry if you ever need a Bloodlust Whirl is ready to give it to you. Sometimes even before the pull. Yep, he is pro like that.

So there you have it the confused Shaman we have in know as Whirlwinder. By sure to say hi and be as confused as we all are when he changes his race or gender again.

Here is a video for you Whirl. If you were an NPC this would be you!

Why Are You Late Again?

So as a guild and raid leader I have heard some wonderful excuses of why people were late or why someone couldn't attend at all. I am not saying they were all lying, but I am probably sure some of them were. So what I wanted people to tell me this week was reasons or excuse you have heard or gave for being late for a raid. So here they are

My girlfriend was going into labour, but I am hardcore I dropped her off at the hospital so I can come home to raid. She will be there long after the raid is over I can catch up with her then.

My friend was robbed I had to go help him see what was missing

I got dragged to a Celine Dion concert. Now I realize telling you this will get me laughed at, but I want you to feel my pain.

My honey do list wasn't finished.

I am not late I am on time with style.

I am on time if you forget what time zone we raid in.

My house was on fire. No really it was.

I'll be the first to admit I should never have Thai food again. The second person is the one who has to clean the bathroom.

I tried to time it so I would sleep through trash. Did I sleep long enough or should I go back to sleep?

The repair man was giving me the eye I didn't feel comfortable turning my back to him at any moment.

I found out it is actually hard to break into my house. I don't know if I should be happy or sad about this at the moment.

My neighbour changed his WiFi password I needed to figure out what it was.

Mom needed me to do the dishes. Apparently she wasn't kidding when she said I hadn't done them for a week.

Getting rid of the bodies took longer than expected.

My dealer was trying to rip me off had to set him straight.

Pickle tickle time is few and far between have to take it when I can get it.

So those were all the ones I could post without getting a stupid amount of hate mail. Enjoy your Easter weekend.

Raid Focus

So after my quotes post I have received a lot of emails asking me if I am really such a big of an asshole to raid with. Now I will tell you I am not, but feel free to ask any of my guild mates or people I have guilded or raided with over the years and I am pretty sure they will all say the same thing. I am a nice guy, but if you piss me off well then that's another story.

I want to relate this to Raiding since most of the quotes I listed if not all of them have to do with that as their focus. I don't lead raids in order to wipe pointless for no reason. I lead raids to be successful. No matter the content that is always my focus at hand. If you have had the opportunity to be in one of my guild's Buy ToC gear runs well then you will see me in a different light. I am very calm I make jokes, but for the most part I know there are going to be bumps where people mess up, because well I am a lot of the time bringing people in who have no idea what is going on. For guild raids it is different I expect everyone to know about the encounter they are going to take part in. If they don't I expect them to ask in order to find out. There is nothing worst and you look no more idiotic then running around like a chicken with your head cut off while 24 others stand and laugh at you.

This being said raids are successful because 25 people come to achieve a goal. If 20 people come to do this and 5 people are just happy to be there bad things will happen. It is even worse if say 15 people come to kill shit, 5 people are happy to be there and then 5 people just want to do whatever the hell they want. This leads to you doing something you shouldn't, which will most likely cause a raid wipe. I am find with wiping for a purpose, when there is a reason behind it and maybe it was out of someones or the raids control. Just got bad luck with the encounter, it happens. Come back do everything again and get it done. The best example of this was when we lost out on server first KJ kill because the server lagged, which caused a wipe. Sometimes things are out of your control, live and learn. What I don't stand for is when someone who did something because they had no clue what they were to do and caused a wipe, or maybe they did know and just didn't do what they were supposed to. They didn't ask and it resulted in wasting every ones time. This I take personally because it is my job as a raid leader to make sure this doesn't happen. So nothing makes me more pissed off then someone doing something they should never have had the opportunity to do. So yes some of those quotes were said at times like this, maybe they were funny, but they got the point across. You are here to do what needs to be done to succeed don't purposely waste peoples time. People are going to say it is just a game, and I am over reacting. Well think of it this way. If you were playing a board game and someone playing took the board and through it across the room sending everything flying you would be pissed. This is the same thing to causing a wipe without knowing what to do or just being an idiot. You mess it up for everyone else. it is just the way it is.

So again I am a nice guy, for the most part, JUST DONT MAKE ME ANGRY. Reminder today is the last day to get in your excuses for being late for raid for tomorrows post. Keep sending them would love to hear them.