Fagerboozle's Story

Happy Halloween everyone! Now I hope everyone has some plans some way or another tonight to enjoy this night for what it is. That being having some sort of fun in a way different than one normally does. So when I was looking through some Halloween type Reader Posts for this week. I came across one which reminded me of a story which first appear back on the WoW forums back in 2005 by someone named Fagerboozle. So I then thought why not share the story with those who may remember it or those who have yet to read it so here it is.

"It makes me look fat."

"Aww punkin' it does not! You look GREAT!" Inwardly, Fa9erboozle sighed. He had hunted for days to find just the right costume, and now, he practically had to stuff Mackey into it. Not that he was complaining, per se -- she stuffed very nicely -- but he could tell by the querulous tone in her voice that this was just the beginning of the complaints.

"It itches me," Mackey pouted. Complaint number two.

"So, do what I do! Scratch!" And with that, Fa9erboozle raked his fingers over one armpit, and then the other, sighing with itch-free relief. He had just reached down to address a pesky new itch on his left cheek, when a chilly glare from Mackey brought him up short. "What?"

"It's not polite to scratch in public," she replied, crisply, flipping her long auburn hair back over her shoulder. The gesture had an interesting effect on her pirate's blouse, which threatened at any moment to spill her bosom out of the front.

Fa9erboozle stood mesmerized for several seconds, before shaking off the effect. "You said the same thing about belching! What am I supposed t'do with all those lovely beer bubbles? Fart 'em?"

"That's impolite, too," replied Mackey with a sniff. She tugged helplessly at the gap in her blouse, trying to shift it into a more modest arrangement.

"I knew you were gonna say that!"

"Well it IS," Mackey snapped. "And could you have possibly gotten a smaller costume? Because I can still breathe a little in this one!" There it was, complaint number three. Thank the gods! That meant they could probably go another hour before she complained about it, again.

Fa9erboozle snorted, "No breathin', no !@#$%in," he muttered. Too late, he clamped a hand over his mouth. Maybe she hadn't caught it. Seconds crept by with agonizing slowness. Then, retribution fell as Mackey's open palm smacked the back of Fa9erboozle's head. While humans weren't exactly the fine, physical specimens that dwarves were, that girl could pack a whallop!

"AAOOWW! What'd you do that for?"

"'No breathin', no ^-*!@in,'" echoed Mackey. "That ring any bells?"

"I didn't say that! I said..." Fa9erboozle's mind scrambled for something plausible, "... I said I liked breedin' and fishin'!"

Mackey rolled her eyes at him with a sigh, "Come on, get into your costume! we're going to be late."

"Are you SURE we're going the right way?"

"Of course I am! I've been taking this shortcut for umpteen years!" Fa9erboozle turned the map a third time, muttering as he did.

Their mounts trotted along, side by side, down the road. Fa9erboozle couldn't help but notice as Mackey periodically stole a stealthy scratch here and there, when she felt no one was looking. She also sent many curious glances in his direction.

"So... what are you supposed to be, again?" she finally asked.

"Tailor said it's some god 'er another. Very popular costume, he says."

"You look like a hairy baby with wings and a crossbow." Mackey looked skeptical. "What kind of a god do you suppose THAT might be?"

"The p-patron god of hairy-babies-with-crossbows, I suppose!" blustered the dwarf.

"Right..." An uncomfortable silence stretched over several minutes. "So... shouldn't we be to Stormwind by now? It's getting dark...."

"We're almost there!" Fa9erboozle snapped.

"I'm just sayin' that it's getting dark! We've been on the road for over six hours now. Maybe we should..."

"No."

"Y'know, stop and..."

"No."

"Ask someone for..."

"NO!"

"...directions."

"No-no-no! No stopping! No directions!" howled Fa9erboozle. "I know exactly where I am!" Beside him, Mackey rolled her eyes again, but remained quiet.

*****

"See? THERE it is!" said Fa9erboozle, triumphantly. It was full dark, and he had to squint, but he could make out the line of the massive walls of Stormwind against the moonless night sky.

Beside him, Mackey peered into the gloom. "Doesn't it seem a little... dark? And what's with all this creepy green mist everywhere?"

"Honey," replied Fa9erboozle patiently, "It's Hallows End! They've DECORATED! See?" Fa9erboozle pointed to the glint of Jack-o-lanterns along the ramparts. And over there is Goldshire. All lights and festivities there!" Several party-goers had spotted the pair and were teetering drunkenly their way.

"Um...what's THAT?" Mackey pointed to a huge, dark shape in the sky.

"Sweetie, that's a Zeppelin." He realized, belatedly, how patronizing he sounded. He'd likely end up paying for that. Right now, though, all he wanted to do was wrap himself around a few beers and some nice roast mutton!

"When did we get Zeppelins in Goldshire?"

"We don't," replied Fa9erboozle as he nudged his goat toward the brightly lit town. He stopped when he realized that Mackey hadn't moved. And then, realization ran down his spine like icewater. We don't!

By then, several townspeople had arranged themselves in a semicircle around the human and dwarf. Fa9erboozle realized that their shambling gait had nothing to do with alcohol. He winced.

"Nice hairy-baby-with-a-crossbow costume," one particularly rancid townsman observed. "Yer girlfriend could do with losing a few pounds though."

Fa9erboozle dropped his face into his cupped hands as he heard Mackey's sharp intake of breath. This was going to get ugly.

"A few pounds? A few POUNDS?!" Mackey's voice was starting to travel the scale. Pretty soon, only dogs would hear her. Most people feared Mackey for her ability to lay into a fella with a pair of swords and a hellcat fury. They didn't know the half of it. Try shrinking her favorite dress in the wash. Fa9erboozle swore that the gates of Hell itself were hidden somewhere behind that woman's teeth. He gripped the pommel of his saddle, and started praying.

"I TOLD you! Didn't I tell you??" Mackey paused long enough to address the townspeople, "I told him this made me look fat, but he never listens!" She stabbed an accusatory finger at the dwarf, "Fa9erboozle JONES," screeched Mackey, "if we get out of this alive, you will NEVER hear the end of it! Do you hear me? NEVER! I'll tell mom, and after I tell her, I'll tell YOUR mother! and then..."

Mackey's steady stream of threats and invective became a surreal buzz in the bleak background of Fa9erboozle's thoughts: death was looking mighty good right now. He was startled by a scrabbly hand gently patting his shoulder.

"Shield n' Hearth, mate," rasped the townsman. "I seen you guys do it all the time."

"What about you?" muttered Fa9erboozle. "Soon as I'm gone, she'll turn on you like a wild worg."

The townsman approximated a shrug. "We're dead already. What could possibly be worse?"

Fa9erboozle winced as he warmed up the hearthstone in his hand. 

There it is. Still as great as the time I first read it. Happy Halloween and enjoy your weekend!

Raiding On Halloween

So I was sitting around today wondering what I was going to talk about. I have been going on the Halloween theme all week so I have been waiting to talk about Civilization" Beyond Earth. I know many of you have been asking about it, but don't worry I will get to it. On the topic of Halloween though I figured I would share some insight as to why I said raiding on Halloween was a bad idea.

Now this is back a few years at the tail end of the Burning Crusade and my guild Three Score had completed all the content. We were in the process of just gearing up for Wrath and really setting the bar for ourselves. We had got through Sunwell that week with really issue and had left KJ for our final boss of the week and the raiding day happened to be on Halloween.

Now before this moment I really don't have any poor memories of raiding on Halloween this night changed that forever though. Not only was Hallow's End in WoW in full swing, but raiding at this point for the guild was really just a fun time and we were really the most focused group. Everyone was using pumpkin treats meaning no one was looking how they should. Now you might be thinking that is not much of a big deal. Normally no. On a fight like KJ where you are cloned and the clones have to be taken care of it is extremely important to know who is the clone. Also you are in groups and the groups separate and come together again and again. We were a well oiled machine but you throw something like this in and bad things happen and they did.

We wiped countless times not just because of these issues, but also people randomly had to deal with answering their doors between pulls or lost sight of their screens because someone called their name. This night of raiding is probably also why I could never raid in a casual guild because I need the structure the timing and I hate wiping to avoidable mistakes. Ask anyone who was ever in a raid of mine I am not always the most happy person.

Now we did eventually get KJ down that night on something like the 11th or 12th pull a fight that we had on farm and barely if ever at this point would take more than 1-2 pulls depending on luck. Although it was endlessly frustrating at the time looking back it was hilarious that we even put up with all the crap that night.

To my Three Score guildies past, present, and future /cheer

This End Have I Reached Before. What New Adventure Lies In Store?

Here we are in the middle of the week and only a couple days from Halloween. Actually the perfect day to carve that pumpkin you have been holding on to or pick one up to bring home and carve. The question everyone asks when they are about to carve their pumpkin is "what?" So I thought the perfect choice for this week's list is the best gaming themed Jack-O-Lanterns I have seen. So here we go.

5. Earthworm Jim

How could you not love anything Earthworm Jim? This pumpkin just makes me want to get out my SNES and start playing.

4. Tetris

At first glace this doesn't look like anything special. Then you think how perfect the cuts would have to be to make this work and not turn into a disaster and you realize how amazing it is.

3. Magicka

Now I love my Magicka a game I think every gamer serious or not should really play. This may not want you to play but it doesn't look pretty amazing even if there is no way to kill the people you are playing with with it.

2.  Bastion

May not be the biggest fan of the game itself, but I don't know how anyone cannot be a fan of this carving.

1. Outlaws

When I first saw this one I was just amazed at not only the work which went into it, but really how the light itself is what makes it.

There you have it. Do you have any which you feel are better? What do you plan on doing with yours? As always let me know one way or another.

You Fail At Being A Gamer On Halloween If...

Fail Day! And also Halloween week. So how could I not combine the two right? Now if you are a gamer and don't enjoy Halloween I really don't know exactly what I should say. It is something to celebrate, but as with anything people tend to mess it up.

 You Fail At Being A Gamer On Halloween If...

• You don't have a gaming themed pumpkin
• You think you will be able to raid uninterrupted
• You actually think your raid will have some form of success
• You haven't realized that the mini chocolate bars are a great gaming snack
• You have never worn a gaming themed costume
• You are dressing up as a human male/female character from WoW for Halloween
• Conner is your favourite Assassin
• You and 3 friends never talked about dressing up as triangle, X, Circle, and Square
• You don't play a horror game on Halloween
• When at a party you don't make random comments about seeing Slender Man
• You are thinking Master Chief is a good costume choice
• You don't have random discussions about the scariest game you ever played
• You don't randomly say the headless horsemen's speech from WoW over and over again

and finally

• You don't celebrate Halloween

There you have it this week's edition of fail. Hope you all enjoyed it and are getting ready for all the fun.

This Is Halloween

Monday, and the start of the week which brings one of my favourite Holidays, Halloween. Don't know why it is but no matter what I am always just a little more pumped this time of year. With Halloween on the mind it was easy enough to pick a machinima for this week's Machinima Monday. It is one from Drascier which includes everyone's favourite Halloween song "This is Halloween" hence the name of the machinima itself. So sit back and enjoy and get in the Halloween mood!



You're welcome

Ask Gauss

Sunday! Yes your weekend is just about over kind of crazy isn't it. Why Sundays are good and bad. They are still the weekend, but then they also remind you the weekend is just about over. Sunday though as you should know if you don't by now is time to answer questions, and if you didn't know you probably didn't know you send your questions into gaussafication@gmail.com but now you do!

So I just finished Shadow of Mordor. Did you like the ending?

Now I liked how the plot was coming to an end. All the lead up I thought was extremely well done. It got me into that mode of gaming where I just had to finish it because I wanted to see how it was all going to come to an end. I even liked how the end actually happened right before that last scene. Now I won't say exactly what it was for spoiler reasons, but yes I agree that wasn't needed. It may be something for a sequel, but it just left me angry and unsatisfied when I throughly enjoyed everything else about the game.

Since Blizzcon is so close, andyou think LoTV is on its way what do you hope to get from the game unit wise for multiplayer?

They really need to make mech some how viable. I don't know how they can do it but it needs to be a threat. Also they need to make the game not predicable match wise in the pro scene. It is great watching the best of the best doing a a certain composition. I would just like a variety when watching the pro scene. So not sure if that answers it but that is what I want.

Is Ubisoft to blame for this FR issue?

Nah I still blame Microsoft

There you have it some questions answered for the week. Thanks to everyone who sent one in if I got to it on here or not. If I didn't will still get to it so I appreciate your patience. Now you can go back to your regular scheduled weekend

Blizzcon Gaps

Happy Friday! Yes the end of the week and only a couple weeks from Blizzcon. Hard to believe it is that time of year already. For this week's Reader Post Romur has brought to my attention something interesting. I'll let you read what he had to say.

So... here's the point: Blizzard has never had gaps from noon until 2 pm on the main stage at BlizzCon. That's a sizable gap, especially after such an amped up opening ceremony. It makes sense that they'd announce the new game and then immediately start talking about it. It also leaves exactly enough time for a new game, as each other game already has exactly 2 gameplay-focused panels.

It's can't be a StarCraft expansion - Yes, Legacy of the Void will be announced, but it already has a panel: StarCraft 2 - What's Next on Friday. That's the same panel title for other unannounced expansion content (either through a WoW patch or Diablo expansion).

There's a large amount of potential play area in the C hall. Here is the floorplan. Copy and paste the Heroes of the Storm area or the StarCraft 2 area onto the south end of the C hall and suddenly you have room for a first look at a new game.

Anyways, I wanted to throw this out there and see what everyone else thinks. The fact is that I simply cannot explain the gaps at noon in the schedule, and Blizzard is too smart to let the hype from the opening ceremony die out right there.

I find this quite interesting and really cannot wait to find out what is happening in that time slot. Let me know what you guys think is happening, because this cannot be a coincidence.

That One Misunderstands Much... And Underestimates More

So with the list yesterday I was talking about lore characters from the Warcraft Universe who disappeared or died and how they should make a return. I made it a point to state coming back from the dead only if it made sense. Meaning Demons from the Twisting Nether. Now I know there is a group of people who want to see the orc above Broxigar return especially in Warlords of Draenor I am not part of that crowd in the least.

Why? Well Broxigar without a doubt in my mind is the greatest hero in all of the Warcraft Universe. This really isn't up for debate it pretty much is fact. Horde or Alliance supporter everyone recognizes what he did. In case you live under a rock here is the WoWPedia description

At the final battle over the Well of Eternity, Brox realized that if the world and the future were to be saved, his companions needed more time. Brox leapt from the back of one of the red dragons also carrying Rhonin into the swirling portal that was opening at the bottom of the funnel. When he passed through, and arrived in the realm of the Burning Legion, he proceeded to slaughter multitudes of demons, blocking their advance towards the portal, slaying so many that he ended up standing atop a mountain of their corpses — mocking more to come challenge him. It was there that he eventually attracted the attention of Sargeras, who came personally to put an end to the orc's life. However, Brox did the impossible, and with the Axe of Cenarius struck a small wound in Sargeras' leg. This wound would later be the focus of Krasus and his allies' spellwork, that for a second, tore Sargeras' attention away from his struggle to keep the portal open... allowing Malfurion and Illidan to close it upon him. Brox's life was ended by Sargeras, right before the demon entered the portal, by the jagged edge of Sargeras's broken sword, and Krasus saw Brox's lifeless corpse impaled on its end. With this final act of loyalty, Broxigar the Red sealed his place in history as the only known mortal to have ever staged an assault upon the Burning Legion's leader.

Broxigar the Red died, not a mere honorable death, but was struck down in a blaze of glory nearly unheard of in the history of the orcs.

Having him in Warlords no matter how he was apart of it would ruin everything he stands for. Would ruin his legacy. Blizzard should know this, I understand people will say the same thing about Grom, but that is much different. Grom's sacrifice for the Orcs was making up for a mistake which was made, and made it right. Warlords is about if that event never happened and he had a different focus what would and could have happened, and not just for Grom, but the Orcs as a whole.

Somethings should never be messed with, and I trulyhope this is one that is never thought about and is never put into place.

Your Duplicity Is Hardly Surprising

Wednesday! Now this is the time of the week where I am putting the list together about something which really has something to do with the here and now. This is kind of like that. You see a lot of you play WoW and WoW with the launch of the newest patch is bringing us closer to the expansion and with the expansion we are getting a look at characters who are not only dead, but some who have been lost to history. This gave me an idea on what other characters not ones that I would bring back because of some weird time travel stuff. Otherwise  I am pretty sure all of you would know I would say Cairne. If they are coming back from the dead it is because a reason exists that it could happen. So here we go top 5 long lost or dead characters to come back in WoW.

5. Mal'Ganis

So he randomly came back in Icecrown and vowed revenge against the Lich King. Then we went into Icecrown Citadel and then never saw anything to do with him. This is really one of the left open plot points which bothers me quite a bit.

4. Medivh

So we came in contact with the resurrected Medvih during the Warcraft III days and he helped us save the world from Archie. Now what is he up to? Well I would like to know.

3. Turalyon

He has been missing forever. Assumed dead, but I do have a feeling he may have ended up on Argus some how. I guess time will only tell if we actually head there at some time or another to see.

2. Tichondrius

So all these other Nathrezim are coming back to life some believe because they are demons others believe because Nathrezim don't really die. No one knows. So why is the one who is supposed to be the biggest and the strongest nowhere to be seen?

1. Illidan Stormrage

If he is a Demon and was just banished to the twisting Nether then I don't see why we wouldn't get another chance for Illidan to come back. He really has always had the best intentions just the way he went about them was just not the best way.

There you have it. List all put together for the week. Have any others you think should have a chance? Let me know. I for one know there are countless more which could have made an appearance.

You Fail At Content Patches If...

Fail Day! Here we are on yet another Tuesday thinking about how others fail. Most of the time the failures I discuss are how gamers are the ones failing. There are times though developers fail. Sure there are countless hours games run smoothly after patches, but those are not the times everyone remembers. We remember the times when everything went wrong, and this is how we are failing this week.

You Fail At Content Patches If...

• You sell them as a DLC
• It really isn't a content patch it is just a bunch of bug fixes
• You avoided the whole testing part
• They go live on a Friday
• You will be loading hotfixes in for weeks
• Your content patch needs a patch
• It broke everything
• You never release content patches
• Your patch notes are the length of a G.R.R.M. novel
• Your patch notes errors cause community uproars
• You are EA
• You patch 90% of the game on release day
• You release an update on when there will be an update
• You thought the last one is a great idea
• You nerf everything just so you can buff it how it was for the next patch
• You believe players really won't care about extended maintenance

and finally

• You really don't know what the patch actually did

There you have it this week's edition of fail. Enjoy your Tuesday and hopefully any patches rolled out today for the games you play go smoothly.

The Grind Halloween Special

Happy Monday! Now instead of going on my normal Monday rampage stuff figured I would get right to the point. Now every Monday I do showcase a video of some sorts. People are always recommending a wide variety of them. Some of them I have shown before and some of them I have not. What I have been asked the last few days though is "Are there any good Halloween Machinima?" well there are a few, and I thought why not show one of them here today. It is an older machinima but still a good one by Obvious Films. So enjoy!


Now all there is to do is wait for Halloween!

Ask Gauss

Well if you haven't already figured it out, Sunday is upon us. The weekend is coming to an end and there are just a few things left to do before it is allowed to end. In my case it is answering some questions for all of you, for all of you it would be reading the answers to the questions I am answering. So why don't we get right to do.

Besides Azshara what other plot points would you like Blizzard to take care of?

Turalyon and Alleria. Turalyon was one of my favorite Warcraft character back in the day, so I'd be happy about his return on that alone. But they also bring with them a certain legacy that's been missing. Does the Alliance have any major Paladin characters anymore? Turalyon would be the perfect way to bring back the symbol of Uther and Arthas and Bolvar the Alliance once had as one of their iconic pillars. Maybe he could even reform the Order of the Silver Hand as an Alliance organization separate from the Argent Crusade. Turalyon and Alleria would also be a good way to give the Alliance characters who are uneasy with the Horde due to their last known interaction with them, but decent enough people to remain within character for the faction about it.

Does it bother you that Shadow of Mordor plays like an Assasin's Creed game?

I wouldn't say it plays like an Assassin's Creed game. I know there are similar elements and I use tactics I often put to use in Assassin's Creed. I would say the game itself is much more complicated then an AC game. The story is also quite different then any game and really is a Middle-Earth type game in that regard. Every game is going to have comparissions, but being compared to a franchise that I am never disappointed in I don't think should be an issue for the Shadow of Mordor team. As I have said before I am beyond happy with how the game plays and I have had tons of fun playing it, and I know I will continue to do so.

If Legacy of the Void is revealed at Blizzcon how long do you think till it comes out?

Soon.

There they are as always thanks to everyone who sent something in. Always happy to answer questions or talk about whatever if it is on here or not. Enjoy what remains of your weekend.

What Are We If Not Slaves To This Torment

Friday. Yes it is almost the weekend. Weekend means we can forget about imortant things for a couple days and sit back and do a whole lot of nothing. Before that though we have Friday the day we think about the whole lot of nothing we are going to be doing on the weekend and read this week's Reader Post. This week I have a post from Jokubas who with the release of the patches patch in WoW has some thoughts on what Blizzard should deal with next plot wise.

Ever since the Wrath Gate, trouble has been brewing with the Forsaken. For years Blizzard has been saying that Sylvanas has been following the path of the Lich King. And yet, even Garrosh, who hated Sylvanas perhaps more than he hated everyone else, ultimately let her do whatever she wanted. But it's really coming to a head. Blizzard said a reckoning is coming, at BlizzCon, and the end of Siege of Orgrimmar wasn't very subtle about how Sylvanas felt about the Horde.

I'm really feeling like it's not just a loose end this time, and something Blizzard has plans for (regardless of how far out they are). What I hope to see from it, though, is a new age for the Forsaken. In Frozen Throne, they were introduced as such a unique concept. Mindless undead... who were given their minds back. They were normal, albeit traumatized, people that happened to inhabit decaying bodies. By all accounts, they should have restored Lordaeron on their own. Instead, from day one Blizzard started writing them like cackling mad scientists not so different from the Scourge that they were supposed to have broken away from. I want to see the Forsaken plot culminate in a new age for them, where they're finally shown to be who they were supposed to be all along: the restored citizens of Lordaeron. I want to see an awesome, artistic dissonance between the gleaming spires of their capital, and the decaying, cursed citizens who inhabit it. I want to see a complex society attempting to recover from a horrific tragedy and struggling with a dark shadow that will always be with them, not the one-dimensional haters of all things living we have right now that, by Blizzard's own admission, are following in the Scourge's footsteps.

The way I'd expect to see that happen is after the resolution of a schism within the Forsaken brought about by the conflict. Some might call it a retread of the Darkspear Rebellion, but the Forsaken have been needing it much longer.

Now I do thing this plot thread interesting as I am a big fan of the Sylvanas story, but for me Azshara really is what I have been asking for for years. With that enjoy your weekend!

Gaming Is Fun

So I was asked the other day why it is I enjoy gaming so much. This seems like such a simple answer "because it is fun", but when I got to think there really is more to it. Gaming is, fun, of course. The major point though is why it is fun.

Fun is different to many other people and that doesn't change gaming wise. Some people into a story which is well put together, which is brought together to the player in such a way that you feel that your really were a part of it. Fun to others is being able to be better than others. To rise to the top and show that you really have some skills to showcase. Fun can also be a time to relax and step away whatever else is going on in your life, and just be somewhere else. And fun can really just be spending time with others doing something together.

When you explain it like that I seem to find others understand more gamer or not exactly what you are referring to. You don't have to be the best or even that good at a game to have fun with it. Anyone can have fun in their own way. That very well could be struggling over and over and then overcoming something you never thought you could. All of my Three Score friends know this feeling. The bosses who took, what seemed like, forever to take and the cheers which erupted when they fell.

Gaming really can be now anything you want it to be. I really think that is why more and more people are embracing it. Gamers aren't just basement dwellers starved for sunlight. They are almost everyone you know. So really when I was asked why I enjoy gaming so much I really thought they should have been able to answer the question themselves.

It is fun, but your fun or my fun is different then what everyone else's is.

There Is No Book, Or Teacher To Give The Answer

Middle of the week seems to get here so much quicker when Monday is a holiday. Think that is true because you really don't pay attention to what day it is until Tuesday. As most of you probably know the pre-expansion patch for Warlords of Draenor went live yesterday. For those of you who have had a chance to try it out hope you are enjoying your time with it. With the patches release though I started to think what expansions or DLCs have been the best? Normally when I have these thoughts I make a list, which is exactly what I am going to do. So here goes.

5. Diablo III: Reaper of Souls

With all the hate that came about because of Diablo III if you agree with it or not one has to recognize that Reaper of Souls should be on this list. It has given the game new life not only with a well done story where you feel you play a integral part, but it is not forced. You get answers to your questions. Also beyond the story the game is just fun to play regardless of playstyle.

4. Civilization V: Brave New World

Civilization expansions are always something special. This one though made you actually consider different strategies when playing the game. It offered a change from the normal, which for a long running game can be a mistake, but this went over very well in my books.

3. World of Warcraft: Wrath of the Lich King 

As always with my lists I try to only have a game on here twice even if it seems to apply in multiple cases. So I seriously thought about which expansion of World of Warcraft was the best. Thus far I must say overall with everything it brought Wrath was it. You felt involved and your part to the story matter. Along with all of the new features brought to the game I really don`t see how one could argue against it.

2. Starcraft: Brood War

It was extremely hard for me not to put this at number 1. This game brought in my eyes one of the greatest villians into the forefront. This game made the Queen of Blades someone never to be forgotten. The game brought inovation to the RTS scene and was played competitively just up until a couple years ago. The game will forever be known as iconic in my eyes and the gaming world as a whole.

1. Assassin's Creed II: Bonfire of Vanities

Bonfire of Vanities was nothing short of spectacular. It not only let us spend more time with one of our favourite characters of all time, but in my eyes is the reason Brotherhood, and Revelations became games in the first place. Every step you want more and at the end you are left with the greatest speech ever in gaming.

There you have it. Think something should be here which is not well let me know one way or another.

You Fail At Being Ready For The Pre-WoD Patch If...

Happy Fail Day and Patch Day as well! Normally those go hand in hand and I suspect this will be no different. There should be plenty of things people will have no idea about along with many things people believe they will know everything about, or then those people looking around trying to follow the flow of people. With that in mind let's get this started.

You Fail At Being Ready For The Pre-WoD Patch If...

• You have no idea what I am talking about
• You are excited about building your garrison
• You are wondering if all your addons will still work
• Your computer could barely run the game before
• You are curious why the dark portal is now red
• You are asking questions Vol'jin as Warchief
• You don't like the new character models
• You are not ready for the stat squish
• You are wondering why everyone is heading to Blackrock Mountain
• You can't wait to say hello to Thrall's father
• You are adamant about this patch not coming out till Nov 13th
• You are worried about your raiding schedule
• You think your raiding schedule matters

and finally

• You didn't start your download before today

There it is this week's edition of fail. Happy Patch Day!

Dr. Shampoo Vs Mr. Green

First off to everyone non Canadian and alike Happy Thanksgiving. I assume like many if not all of you have a lot to be thankful for. I won't bore all of you with those in depth details, but will thank all of you here reading this today for being here today reading this. Right this blog for fun and I have a hope that some of you out there enjoy reading it as much as I do in writing it. With that in mind and it being Monday here is a ROFLBear episode from a few years ago I think is great for the theme of the day. Thank you once again to Myndflame for this amazing series



I know ROFLBear still wins even now

Ask Gauss

Here we are on Sunday and getting ready for my second of third Thanksgiving meals. Turkey comma may set in tonight, but only time will tell I guess. Before that does happen I figured I would fulfill my Sunday obligation and answer some questions.

So pre-Warlords Patch this Tuesday, will we see you on?

Yes! I will probably resub Tuesday and take part in all the happy fun times. If you see me online as always drop me a line. Will be on Llane as always come say hello, and if I don't answer you know the drill keep it up until you get through. I am actually really looking forward to everything for the first time in awhile this is an expansion I am really excited for game and lore wise. Should be lots of fun ahead and this is just pre-expansion stuff.

Who is the nest Hero you want to see in Heroes of the Storm?

I would love to see some more Starcraft and Diablo heroes in the game. If I had to pick one I would go will Fenix to make an appearance. I also would not care if it was in regular combat or dragoon form. The character himself is a fan favourite of the older fanbase of the universe and really would give the newer audience something to get them into the past of the franchise. There is, of course, countless heroes I would love to see be apart of the game and I am sure eventually they will all make there way in this is just one I am hoping makes it way in sooner rather than later.

What is Ner'Zul up to in WoD?

Having tea in a hut somewhere I suppose

There you have questions all answered for the week. For those who sent something in and didn't get it answered as always I will get to it, and I thank you for your patience. Enjoy what is left of your weekend if it is a long one or not for you.

My Life For Aiur?

Here we are on a Friday of a long weekend. Well if you are Canadian that is we have Thanksgiving this coming Monday. The true date for Thanksgiving not that random Thursday they celebrate it to the south. Regardless of that or not as each day passes we are getting closer and closer to Blizzcon. Now something which I am looking forward to at Blizzcon is if we are going to get some information on Legacy of the Void. Sure the multiplayer as we know will be all good and seriously competitive, but just as much I am looking forward to knowing how the story is going to end. With that in mind this brings us to this week's Reader Post submitted by Gradius who came up with 10 reasons why the Protoss should not be trying to take back their Homeworld of Aiur.

1) Artanis states in the DT saga that they don't have the numbers to take Aiur. They could probably do it, but it would weaken them too much. And they have other things to worry about during the Second Great War.

2) The hybrids are coming en-masse, and this arc will reach its pinnacle in LoTV. Therefore, it would be a blunder to waste all your resources on retaking a planet that nobody cares about anymore. If the protoss know about hybrids, then initiating this plan would be a mistake.

3) Queens now control some of the forces on Aiur (and Kerrigan by extension), so it's not like they are just going to roll over and die. The protoss did not actually know this until Cold Symmetry, so they now have even less impetus to take it than when Artanis said they're not going to in the DT saga.

4) Forget about Aiur, they had to call off the attack on Saalok, Aiur's moon in Cold Symmetry. How about we retake the moon in LoTV, and leave Aiur itself for SC3?

5) Aiur poses absolutely no strategic value to the protoss. There is nothing on this planet that makes it superior to one not riddled with 5 billion zerg. Why retake it? There is no point besides emotional sentiment.

6) The protoss have already relocated their entire civilization. This is a big deal. They're not going to do it again for no reason. They are on Shakuras and they are there to stay, at least until peacetime. You do not transfer your empire to a new planet for nostalgic reasons. You just don't.

7) Switching homeworlds again is only going to confuse people. Ever watched a SC2 match where the commentators remark how that guy just warped in from Aiur? And then his co-caster says "actually, they're now coming from Shakuras." Wrong again! They're back on Aiur now! :D

From a writing perspective, leaving the protoss on Shakuras is the right call, as they will no longer be hampered by their past, and are free to grow in whatever direction the writers choose.

8) Retaking Aiur would waste valuable and precious protoss lives, a rare commodity these days. And all for nostalgic reasons. The protoss are supposed to be an intelligent race. This means that they learn from their mistakes, not keep repeating them.

9) "They're dealing with internal strife". Clearly no time to retake Aiur.

10) Of course, it's different if Kerrigan just decides to remove the zerg from Aiur, but such an action would rob the protoss of their rightful revenge and would serve to reinforce how weak they are, that they can't retake Aiur by themselves, and have to be granted favors by Kerrigan. At least IMO.

To sum it up, the protoss have been rebuilding for 4 years because their civilization was nearly wiped out in Brood War. They have been rebuilding to survive, not waste resources on retaking a planet solely for nostalgic reasons while they are in the middle of the Second Great War.

Now as I agree with these points for the most part what happens if Amon's operations bring them to Aiur and that some how the retaking of it happens at the same time? As always thanks to everyone for their submissions, and enjoy your weekend!

Unity Story Trailer

So the other day I came across this gem of a trailer



Now that I assume you have watched it. What did you think? Now the Assassin's Creed stories have always been well put together. At least the stories from the past. If you like the characters or not(I am looking at all those Conner haters out there) the always progress in a way where the are learning something to achieve the greater good. This, of course, is dependent on the time period of the setting. As someone who is interested in history more than most is probably why the games themselves have always sparked interest to me. When I learn or talk about history I always wonder what it would have like to have been there or seen that and wonder exactly how those around me acted. Sure you can read history books and you get some form of an explanation, but Assassin's Creed at least at the moment gives you one of the best ways to actually see it.

Now I know what many of you are saying out loud or thinking, it isn't real or it at least cannot be proven to be fact. This is true, but that doesn't mean the time and effort which go into making the environments and the history itself match up to real events. To someone like me I very much appreciate the effort put into such things.

This again brings me to this trailer. The French Revolution has always been a part of history which has always been most interesting to me. The people were pushed to the brink and fought no matter the cost to get what they believed they deserved and because they were forced to extremes they acted in such a way which seems crazy and beyond extreme itself. So when I first heard they were doing the French Revolution I was pumped up more than you can imagine. Every trailer makes me think makes me hope of the things we will get to see while playing, and so far I have not been disappointed.

That Was An 11.1842

Happy Wednesday and Happy start to the NHL season. Don't watch hockey you say? Then what is wrong with you? And that just isn't my Canadian self speaking. I hadthis in mind when I came up with the topic for this week's list. Sports games are still some of the best games to play with others. More fun when in the same room then online, but still they are some of the best. They are about showing up your opponent in every way you possibly can just so you can throw it in their face at a later date. I know it really is something. So here you have it my top 5 favourite sports games.

5. WWF Attitude

Now some probably won't even consider this a sports game. Honestly I don't really care if you do or not. I think what this game did had an impact on all sports game which came after. The create wrestler component of this game was exceptional for the time and really expanded on a "meh" features from all other games at the time. This plus being able to go 4 player nuts made this game a great get together game at any time. 

4. Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2003 

I don't think there has ever been a bad Tiger Woods game, but this one in my eyes is the runaway winner as the best of the bunch. The game was channeling and ridiculous at other moments. Not sure I ever had a bad time playing the game.

3. Wii Sports Resort

Who really hasn't played Wii Sports Resort? Whatever game you choose that day is never a bad choice. Not to mention it really is something you can play anywhere with anyone and be fun. Now not really the most fun game alone, but who really plays it alone anyway? 

2. NHL 98

The first NHL to actually try to have player's faces be part of the game. At times it looked silly but it made it feel more real. This game finally had better control over the simple things of the game, which made the skill of actually playing it something which had some importance.

1.  NBA Street Vol.2

If you were ever looking for a channeling, ridiculous, aburb fun game with the craziest person as your commentator this is the game. Now the first game was great but the second took a wining formula and made it even better. I really hate basketball games and this game is beyond amazing and still to this day is stupid fun.

There you have it. This week's list and I am sure there will be loads of arguments about games being left off my list. That though is the best part it is my list.

You Fail At Shadow of Mordor If...

Fail Day, and here we are a week later after the week that was Shadow of Mordor. A game that I have had more fun playing then I expect. A game which I thought I might only be getting because of the Middle Earth name, but has surprised me immensely. With all that in mind there are still plenty of ways to fail so here we go.

You Fail At Shadow of Mordor If...

• You think this game is only a AAA game because of the Middle Earth reference
• You think enemies swarming you makes it unfair
• You don't like the Nemesis system
• You think the riding mechanics are the best part of the game
• You don't enjoy mindless killing of orcs
• Pressing more than one button is too complicated for you
• You can't dodge combo
• You can't counter combo
• You simply just can't combo
• You haven't tried using multiple captains
• You don't enjoy using Shadow Strike
• You don't purposely create a swarm of enemies to see how many you can take on before hand cramps set in
• You think this is some Batman or AC copy game

and finally

• You are playing it on XBOX

There you go there is this week's edition of fail. Hope you enjoyed it as much as you have been enjoying your orc slaying.

MoP In Reverse

Monday. Even if you pretend it is not here it still is. As always Monday's need something for us to feel better about. So why not watch something, which changes a story which was a fall from grace into a nice uplifting story? This is exactly what Slightly Impressive has done. As some of you may know he has done a series of Machinima telling the stories of the expansions so with nothing left really to tell stories about he decided to tell the story of Mists of Pandaria in reverse. Yes, that is correct. So sit back have a smile and maybe you might even laugh a little.




Yes you did just watch that.

Ask Gauss

Sunday... yes your weekend is coming to an end. You can be a sad panda another time for right now you are here to see what questions have been asked of me this week, and exactly how I am going to respond to them. Or maybe you are here randomly and don't know why. If that was the case then you now know exactly what is about to happen. So let's do this

So honestly did you really think Shadow of Mordor would play out this well?

I always had my hopes. I like all of the trailers and I became extremely hyped when I saw the Nemesis system working during E3. Sure the game plays a lot like the Batman games and Assassin's Creed, but why is that a bad thing. Those games are successful and they have built on those ideas and put in something I truly believe will be looked back on in years to come as something special. Do I think the game is one of the best ever? No, but it is extremely fun to play and besides some slight anger issues when mounted I have enjoyed every minute I have played.

Do you thin the Heroes of the Storm shutdown means the game is closer?

Well we do know that when it comes back up on Tuesday there will be new hardware, more people playing and most importantly it will be connected directly to Battle.net. That last one is the most important thing. They are keeping the same process as they were with Hearthstone. The game is getting closer and with a larger pool of players will have more opportunities for testing. Blizzard games though are surprisingly hard to predict so release date is just something we will have to wait for.

Do you plan on playing Rift again when the expansion launches?

Maybe, haven't decided yet will keep you all posted.

There is the questions for the week. Thanks as always to everyone who sent something in if I answered it on here or not. This would not be possible without your contributions. Enjoy what is left of your weekend!

When You Walk Among The Black Forest, You Will See

Happy Friday Everyone! Yes we are at the end of the week and it is just about time to sit back and enjoy some time of relaxation. It is also time for me to go through my emails and see what all ofyou have sent in for this week's Reader Post. As many of you know I am a huge fan of the lore of the Warcraft Universe and am always up for an interesting discussion. This week I bring you some thoughts from Walkindude who has some concerns about the death of Y'Shaarj. So have a read.
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Presumably the Sha's effect on Pandaria is what the Titan's perceived as tainted. But we DO clear Y'Shaarj from Azeroth. Nothing of him remains. So shouldn't it follow that whatever dangers the Titan's feared of his entire eradication should now pose a real threat to us? The Titans intentionally kept his heart "alive" and sealed it in a Vault. There was no resource that the "champions" or major lore characters used to defeat Garrosh and in turn, Y'Shaarj that wasn't immediately available to the Titans themselves.

One can argue that we didn't "kill" C'thun and Yogg Saron; that we simply just returned them to their slumber. But we absolutely removed Y'Shaarj from existence. He is no more. If the Titans kept his essence alive, it is either because (and what we have been lead to believe) destroying an Old God entirely would harm Azeroth or the Titans chose to imprison the Old Gods for reasons we don't understand. Perhaps these reasons aren't benevolent.

I wonder if the Old Gods weren't creations of the Titans much as we learned during the green fire quest that Doom Lords at least, were the Titan's personal magic enforcers before Sargeras' fall. Or perhaps, much like the story of Cronus being the father of Zeus, the Old Gods are the progenitors of the Titans who over threw them much like the Olympians destroyed the Greek Titans.

This is certainly an interesting speculation. While I don't have a direct opinion on how this plays out. I know we will have to deal with "defeating" the Old Gods at some point or another. They seem to be connected to everything so it only makes sense that they will be there till the very end.

Kicking Ass and Tolkien Names

Here I am with a little break from Orc slaying and beheading to give you my non spoiler review of Shadow of Mordor. Now many of you know that I have been excited about this game for some time now. Basically ever since I saw the first trailer for it a few months back. Now this type of game is in my wheel house so keep that in mind when you are listening to what I have to say.

One thing I believe this game will be remembered for is the Nemesis system. The system itself is dynamic. Since the main is already dead you might be thinking that there isn’t much to be lost if Tailon "dies", but although it doesn't make much difference to him it does affect the world you are playing in. Whoever defeats you will invariably get some sort of promotion, and since time passes while you’re resurrecting yourself a sequence of losses can see the hierarchy of the orcish troops change considerably. As your enemies rise in rank their abilities and number of followers increase, and your primary goal of taking out Sauron’s most important commanders becomes more and more complicated. Yes it really is that awesome.

Also orcs won’t just rise in rank depending on how they fare against you but they’ll also remember you when you come back, mocking you if you ran away or showing off battle scars if you've previously provided them with one. In a fight they’ll come right for you casting everyone aside to get to you then those same orcs chant their name as if it suddenly became part of a fight club.

You can also even prepare for a fight ahead of time by torturing those orcs of lower ranks. These snitches will spill everything what kind of weapons they use, whether they’re cowards or what they fear, or exactly what army they command. This information can turn the tide, but rather than just killing your nemesis you can choose to spare them in battle and turn them into allies. You can set their goals like assassinating other key figures or spreading dissent.

The Nemesis system ensures the game is never linear and like I said before this will be what the game is remembered before. Now as always most games aren't perfect and if I had a couple things to complain about it would be that Mordor isn't as big as you would hope and the terrain itself could have some more variability. Also the riding mechanics remind me of an early Assassin's Creed game so they aren't the most fun thing to deal with. I am sure some people will complain all the enemies are Orcs, but really in a Middle Earth game that doesn't bother me at all.

So really I am have tons of fun mindless killing Orcs and having them do my bidding. I figured I would like this game because of the setting, but I am seeing others enjoying the game regardless if they are Tolkien fans or not.33

You Have No Idea What I Am Capable Of

So here were are the first of October and if you are reading this you probably aren't doing what I am doing. That is playing Shadow of Mordor. Now so far I am really enjoying the game and it is living up to its violent and brutal scenes. This then gave me a great idea for this week's list, that being the best violent and brutal scenes in video games. Now part of my stipulations for this is they have to be a part of the game itself which anyone can see. They couldn't be random things you could setup or do yourself to "make" the scene on your own. With that in mine here is my top 5.

5. Killing Edgar Ross - Red Dead Redemption

With no real mission telling you where to go you just instinctively ended up back here to seek out revenge for the death of your father. The game didn't disappoint on one of my favourite moments of vengeance you will ever find in a game.

4. Cutting Off Lee's Arm - The Walking Dead

This scene is so awesome you have trouble watching it. Lee is just bitten and they want to try and stop the infection. You have no choice, but to watch this play out with saw and all.

3.  Ezio Kills Uberto - Assasin's Creed II

Ezio's first kill is by far one of the most memorable and probably least stealthiest Assassinations he ever did. Not that Uberto didn't get what was coming to him with the murder of Ezio's family, but there are definite dem feel moments in this scene.

2. Zack's Last Fight - Crisis Core

This is the moment which leads to the story of one of the greatest games ever made. In addition the creation of one of if not the best protaganists you will ever find in gaming. This moment had a lot to live up to for this entire prequel to be worth it and it did not disappoint.

1. Ellie Kills David - The Last of Us 



So here you are at one of the best cat and mouse games you will ever take part in crawling around a restaurant. David then has you pinned down and he has ever intention of raping her until she grabs the blade and preforms a hack job worthy of any horror movie. Not only was this moment extremely satisfying, but it left you almost exhausted with what could have actually happened in front of you. Scenes like this one is why this game really is one of the best if not the best in games of all time.

There you have it this week's list as always tell me what you think right or wrong.