Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Ways That Morons Die

I think the topic explains it all. I wrote this about a week ago just have yet to post it. As always keep telling me what you think and as always if you give me the idea to write about I will give you the props for it. So Blackie this one was all your doing.

Drowning: anyone who dies from drowning is obviously a complete moron. You can go afk come back 20 minutes later and still be alive if you haven't disconnected. This is near the top of the fail meter and if your not related to Bagellord or Vero I am sure you must have missed them in the tree.

Jump off TB for Gold: Are you really that stupid and actually believed me. I just wanted to see how retarded you actually were, obviously since you did it it seems a lot more than my original estimations.

Druid Trying to be Cool: So you dismounted and tried to go flight form before hitting the ground, but you failed at trying to be awesome and proved you are a product of failure. Go level your pally.

In a Fire: You are a god among noobs, since you are actually in a raid with your amazing ability to suck more than Justin Timberlake at a Cirque du Soleil party.

In the Whelp Cave: Ah yes the classic minus 50dkp death. Grats blizzard for bringing this back so a new group of idiots can be found and branded among us all.

Low Level Instance: Apparently you can't solo Scarlet Monastery. Don't worry we already expected you ret pally ass would find something to complain about.

Doom Guard Summon: If only this still happened. Nothing like watching some idiot help summon like they were being a nice guy just to watch them die. Oh how I miss this.

Pulling Aggro: There is this mod called Omen it tells you that your threat is too high you should get it. If you have it there just aren't enough words to make fun of you to the best of my ability.

Yes Whirlwind is Bad: Apparently when a mob spins in circles with a weapon and hits melee it hurts. Go figure. Grats you have proven your a dumbass.

They Can See Through Stealth: After the rogue complains for 10 minutes that he was stealth and you are still pointing and laughing at him maybe he will realize what see through stealth actually means. Fan of knives on a single target more you idiot

Proximity Aggro: Standing next to something bigger and stronger than you which is pissed off is never a good idea. I'd ask you how stupid you are, but I am sure I just found that out for myself. Excuse me while I teabag your corpse.

40 Level 1 Gnomes: You just got owned and will be laughed at for years on youtube. Just be thankful you can pay for a name change.

AFK Beatdown: Apparently you are so clueless you couldn't be attacked or assumed people would realize you were AFK and would let you live. You obviously are more retarded than I first thought. You sir are that special king of stupid.

You Tried to Solo Chillmaw and Failed: LOL. Wow you really are that bad. I have been looking for someone like you for awhile. Just know that you made my day and I can at least thank you for that.

I am sure there are more and as always I welcome your input as long as I can make fun of you if its stupid.

The Story of Gauss' Immortality

So lately I have been asked why everyone knows who I am and why I seem to have such a following. So early this morning I wrote it all down while trying to stay awake and not be yelled at by a crazy women sitting in a hospital bed next to me. So here is the story of Gauss the little Tauren from Camp Narache who had the dream to be something more.

I came to be like any tauren warrior battersworn hammer swinging in a loincloth owning the strider population out in Camp Narache, ah those were the days. It was peaceful then, the game had just begun and there were no guilds looking for new members in starting areas. Just a bunch of clueless losers asking each other what the hell we were supposed to do. Oh the fun we had. It was a sad day though when I left Camp Narache went to Bloodhoof then eventually made my way to Thunder Bluff where Cairne told me I was destined for great things. He also informed me I had been chosen to head to our ancestral lands in the Barrens. I was so proud of my noob ass, and I was on my way leaving everything I knew of Mulgore behind.

When I got to the Barrens I realized why it was called the Barrens. There was hardly anyone around and this surprisingly made leveling quite easy. For when I reached level 15 on my way to the Capital City of Orgrimmar I met an Undead rogue by the name of Ajax who asked me to join his guild. I really had no clue what a guild was or what it did but hey I was so awesome because I was level 15 and this guy is only level 12. This is obviously why he wanted me. I joined "The Renegades" and continued my quest to reach Orgrimmar.

When I arrived it was much quieter than it is today and looking at the auction house I was quite disappointed when nothing on it was above level 12. Upon meeting Thrall who welcome me and my tauren brothers I grabbed the flight path and headed back to the Crossroads to continue my leveling escapades. This went well and when I became the first level 20 in the guild I was promoted to an officer and then was informed we would be merging with a larger guild so we could do bigger and better things. This was great maybe I could actually get a group for Wailing Caverns now. Anyways this guild was known as "The Drunken Bandits"

I joined this guild and progressed through the ranks until I reached level 39. Apparently I wasn't going to be promoted any further because I was too outspoken and to harsh on other people for not being as well informed as I was. So Gaussie did what he was destined to do. When I got to Level 40 went and bought akodo and was truly now that which was full of awesome. I had a fucking mount. I left that guild and decided to create an army of like minded people. On this day "The Army of Gauss" was born and it thrived. Members first came by the 10s and then by the 100s and when I reached level 60 the Army had grown to over 500 members. I would be recognized walking through the cities as "Wow there really is a Gauss". These cities were now starting to mass with people and when I rode through Orgrimmar on my Epic Pink Kodo people stopped to look.

So I now had this Army, which were at my beck and call,what was I to do? I did what anyone in my position would have done. I declared war openly on alliance guilds and challenged them to all out combat. The Army now was being referred to in short by everyone as only AoG. There was strength in numbers and took down all comers even the leaders of the alliance. How epic I looked in my full Valor leading the charge. It was soon known where Gauss was so was the rest of AoG and that meant the alliance would need to be ready.

The Honor system was then introduced and titles were up for grabs and there was only one title which would be good enough for Gauss "High Warlord" would be it and so the quest for it began. After countless battles for South Shore and the Crossraods I had achieved the rank of Champion and I had the Army to thank for it. My name was spreading and cheering erupted among the masses when I and the rest of AoG arrived at any battle.

Not too long after this was when Battlegrounds came to be. It was in these battlegrounds that team play became a major focus. For my team was extremely well organized and focused we were known for humiliating the opposing teams by playing them naked or in black dresses. These humiliations became forum fodder and my name began to spread to the masses even more. These were days of intense grind, but we all got through it.

This was also a sad time. For the Army became so large 850+ members that it was almost 3 guilds in one and I decided it was the time to let the Army run its own course. For on this day Gauss left his Army to pursue his future. Three Score was born. It was to bea group of elite players from two separate guilds AoG and Soviet Honda who came together to be something great.

After some tough times at the start I assumed the Leadership and we began to thrive. We killed bosses we never thought possible and myself achieved High Warlord status. For when this quest was completed it opened the door for others to begin. The Molten Core was Conquered and the Leader of Blackwing Lair was defeated. Along with Several Boss in the Temple of Ahn' Qiraj and Old school Naxx. Three Score became one of the top raiding guilds on the server and I was the face of it. So when Blizzard brought us the challenge of the Burning Crusade we were ready.

We downed all content that was brought to us. And this was when the Gaussian empire took on another quest. The Prismatic Shard Emporium was created and now the auction house was mine. I formed a monopoly forcing people to pay the prices I saw fit. I even turned Boomstick Imports into my home base. There was a sea of workers I employed, which included dancers, doormen, firework launchers and shard Vendors. Boomsticks became the place not only for deals on everything you needed, but just to have a good time. For within a month of my enterprise I had reached the gold cap and everyone knew it, then came a second toon and then a third and the gold kept rolling in. My name became known not only for the guild and its success, but for that of my wealth and fame for running the shop.

I now not only now ran the top rading guild on the server, I owned the auction house and could change prices on anything in the blink of an eye. I could even decide if I so wished to have an empty auction house just to mess with people. The masses crowned me the King of Llane and it was celebrated with the spamming of Pi. A tradition which everyone knows goes on today.

When Wrath came the emporium was shutdown and I retired mostly from my opportunistic gold enterprise, but people remember it and it lives on, and maybe one day it will return. Only time will tell I guess.

I though have gone back to my roots of Army gathering and organizing attacks on the alliance cities and helping the clueless experience content they would never have dreamed possible of seeing. For this would be the current chapter of the Story and one that is still being written. What I will attempt to accomplish next is any ones guess.

So you all now know the Story of Gauss, the little Tauren from Camp Narache with the dream. So anyone who asks will now just be directed here since first and foremost I don't answer questions and you all should know that by now.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

The Burning Crusade is Still Fun

So continuing my old raids pledge I made last week yesterday we did some BC raids among them being Gruul, Mag, SSC, TK, and BT. I didn't do Mount Hyjal because I hate that place with a passion and Sunwell well I can only imagine what would happen if you brought a bunch of idiots in there. Maybe one day when I am drunk as hell and I am a little suicidal. First I would like to say if I was starting to change my thinking that the random idiot who plays this game is actually somewhat competent this thinking has completely gone out the window. So lets explain the fun which was these raids.


High King was interesting for the fact that my explanation of melee don't attack the mage seem to mean everyone nuke the mage like mindless idiots. This made me come to the conclusion of why Naxx is so easy because a bunch of idiots can't do High King. Now we didn't wipe but even I was surprise at the epic fail at the ability to listen. This made me hope to god we didn't get a ground slam on Gruul and thank god we didn't because it would have been ugly.


So when someone says in raid "where is hellfire peninsula?" you know first off that this person is full of win. Secondly do you think I was surprise to look at him and notice he was not only a Bloodelf but a DK. And people think I pull this shit out of my ass sometimes. Thank God I had 4 other non retards amazing that they had to be guildies to be cube clickers. Also I thanked the WoW gods our dps was good enough to only get one Blast Nova. Gauss Nation has Mag down.


So when people first can't in the dam instance because they have trouble getting through a waterfall you learn to not be surprised when they actually enter the instance and they decide taking the elevator is for noobs and proceed to ask for a rez at the bottom where they plummeted to their death. My biggest fear in this instance was going to be that my constant spamming of "Don't pull Hydross" would somehow be missed and some random idiot would pull the boss. Amazingly my confidence was buffed when we all avoided the boss! That then was soon shattered when someone had the brilliant idea that this was the time to fish up Lurker! Yes someone fished up Lurker when we were on the ramp at Hydross. Lets just say when the archers started picking people off one by one although funny I realized a bunch of 80s might actually wipe in SSC. 5 of us actually made it to Lurker without dying the only thing wrong with this was no healers were left alive. So ya we wiped on Lurker...

The great thing next was "How do you dive when your dead?" Honestly how do these people get to Level 80 better yet how do they get to level 10. Apparently the whole thing about clicking your right mouse button if difficult you would think all the dam clickers and keyboard turners would have figured this dam thing out.

Next came Vashj a boss that most of these tools didn't have a dream of ever seeing. My constant spamming of "The boss is immune during P2" apparently must have been in Swahili since there was like 10 people trying to kill her. Then came the fun when some random idiot got the core and whispered me to tell me they couldn't move. Ah yes why do I even explain anything. Somehow we managed to get the cores relayed even I am clueless to how this was even possible. At least I got to ninja the loot and remove a druid for being a complete idiot. Grats Vero you will be my tool to make fun of this week.


Lets be clear here. A mob that whirlwind hits everyone around it and Melee will die. How are people this retarded honestly? Oh wait it was a DK and a ret pally. I also came to the conclusion here that avoiding trash is pointless since there is always some idiot that can't follow the fruit loops on their map. Just pull everything!

So I actually tried to explain Kael telling people where I wanted shit to die and in what order. I think the only thing people listened to was "Loot every legendary you can use" they did that faster than I could even thought possible. The Orange colour must have made they feel they actually weren't useless and horrible. Not to worry I made sure I told them all on vent what I thought about them. I then decided it might be more fun to actually just let whatever happened on bosses from now on to let happen. At least there was some people who knew what they were doing. Thank God for guildies.


So my thoughts at the ending of TK went on. They weren't going to listen anyway I might as well laugh at them. We invented a new achievement for Shade of Akama. Since when I said "don't talk to akama till I say" apparently might talk to him as soon as you get in the room. So we activated Akama hard mode. All the adds during the fight plus all the adds in the room. This was pretty entertaining. Gorfiend next and I hoped some random tool would get shadow of death and cause constructs to go nuts in the raid. I had to call for stop DPS so at least one person would die from it. Grats to Kùsh I know he enjoyed being the special one. RoS wasn't as fun as it could have been since healers were nice to people when they were killing themselves. Dam them ruining my fun. Bloodboil was entertaining especially when the clueless were dying from 4-5 stacks of bloodboil. Who was the guy that told people to stand at max range the whole time. Oh wait that was me... Sadly only 1 fel rage the fun here could have been endless. Mother saw mass deaths apparently this happens when you don't explain fatal attraction. Hey they weren't going to listen anyway lets at least make it fun! Council was surprisingly easy I wanted people to die in fire. Way to ruin my day. Of course Illidan was to follow and my nightmares of 100000000000 shadow fiends in the raid weren't realized since we killed him fast enough to not get any. That would have been quite the screenshot. Also sadly a warglaive didn't drop as it would have been fun to hear the drama with me ninjaing that. There is always next time.

So that was the BC fun. Hope everyone who came enjoyed my constant laughing at those who were clueless. To those who were clueless you make me want to run it again so hope you will come again. I don't know what I will run next Saturday, but I am up for suggestions

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Getting Married In WoW

So I was reading the paper the other day as I normally do when there isn't much else to do. Leafs Own by the way and screw all you non Hockey people. Where was I? Oh ya. I saw an article of this couple who had a World of Warcraft themed wedding. Besides laughing my ass off for a good 10-15 minutes and getting many looks from passersby I thought dam I could write something full of awesome about this.

Now they did this wedding dressed as bloodelves and had the entire place decorated to look like Silvermoon. This made me laugh more knowing that these people fail at WoW and not only at real life. When I went on to read that they had first married their toons in this exact place in Warcraft and wanted to replicate it. Oh isn't that sweet your thinking, I was thinking more of pathetic but to each their own. Anyways this got me thinking where people could actually get married in WoW and how I could possibly rip them apart for doing it, because well that's what I do don't I?

So here goes...

Light's Hope Chapel: So this is a church of course it is surround by death, corpses and almost seems as if your life will be over at any moment. Hey wait this place defines marriage!

Twin Colossus in Feralas: So this is nice in the jungle on top of a mountain or peak whatever you want to call it. It even has a little pond everyone can crowd around wouldn't that be sweet. This though would be a great place for a shotgun wedding since there isn't a simple way to get down from here. So no way out. On the other hand if you realized your life is over this is a great place to commit suicide from.

Lower City: This is your welfare wedding location everything is on the cheap and I assume all the drugs you crack babies will need will not be hard to find. The best part is this is where you picked up your crack whore of a wife and you live in that box by the bird guy.

Moonglade: This would be the perfect place to go if you want no one to come. But really if your getting married in WoW you have no friends anyway so guests isn't something you have to worry about.

Black Temple: This place is like a whore house. Oh wait you met in one...

Scarlet Monastery Cathedral: It's a church and everything is not surrounded by corpses and death. To bad this place is like the definition of fail. Insert "Arise my Champion joke here"

Krauss Landing: At least if you did it here it would appear that people actually cared as there would always be people around. To bad this just proves the fact that you fail.

Winterspring Hot Springs: We all know this was the perfect place for a funeral. God that video was awesome. I AIN'T NO GOD DAM SON OF A BITCH!!! To those that live in a cave I can only imagine the forum bitching and complaining which would happen if it were a wedding. This would be so win.

Ok so this wasn't that great but I saw the article and had to right something about it. Also I managed to click a classic WoW video in the process so that is win. So screw you all.

Yes I will be doing some BC raids tonight for all of you who keep asking me and I am ignoring you

Friday, September 25, 2009

Companion Pets and What They Say

Some people have been asking me to do this one for a couple weeks so I finally finished and decided to throw it up. Enjoy another Gaussie rant

Cat: So let's get his straight you are playing a game with over 100+ pets you could get and is also a game centred around fantasy and yet you pick a cat. Is your name Bagellord or are you just and idiot?

Magical Crawdad: You spent hours upon hours fishing this dam thing and everyone knows this yet when you are having an epeen contest this is the first one your bring out. Am I the only one who sees a problem here? Wait..I understand its not time wasted if you have nothing else you could possibly do. Grats at failing real life...I mean on the crawdad.

Willy: Face it you are using this pet so you can feed it biscuits so you can tell everyone "My willy is so big". That is not only not funny, but I am sure it proves the opposite is the actual truth.

Champion Seal Pets: So you wasted days and days doing dailies and bought something that serves no purpose but to stand beside you and look pretty. On the fail meter you rank pretty high here, and showing that you have more than one isn't doing you any favours...

Wolpertinger: Your using this pet because it makes you feel better because the dam thing is so ugly. You wouldn't feel better if you looked in the mirror once in awhile.

Egbert: Hello king of ADD. Your using this pet because it attracts attention by people asking you "does he always run off like that" or "is he going to pull the boss?" As always this doesn't mean you have friends this means your pathetic.

Battle Bot: So when you go into a store and say "OMG a need the Mountain Dew that gives me the pet in WoW" the people that started laughing are not laughing with you they are laughing at you. And yes that means your mom lied to you.

Sporebat: So not only did you farm a useless rep, but you went around collecting useless mushrooms to pay for the dam thing. That is like double fail. Your mother should apologize to the world for giving birth to you.

Mechanical Chicken: You are the kind of person that buys a blowup doll aren't you?

Blizzard Bear: This screams perfect for you if you have the Jenkins and Champion of the Frozen wastes title. People won't laugh at you they will just nod at the understanding that you are utterly horrible.

Collector's Edition Pets: You are admitting that you are not only addicted to this game, but that you paid $40 more just so you could get a pet in game. Do I need to add anything else?

Spirit of Competition: You get this pet just for participating. Your like that kid at the track meet that is so far behind everyone its embarrassing because the people are lined up for the next race waiting for them to finish. This pet should really renamed Spirit of Failure.

Argent Gruntling: So you think Child Labour is ok? WTF is wrong with you. Get your own crap you lazy bastard.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Public Service

It has come to my attention that people find me offensive, harsh, and cruel. So in order to change peoples opinions on this I have decided to preform this public service message.

I Gauss would like to apologize for my constant humiliation of those lesser than myself. I should realize that people like Bagellord are horrible, fail at everything they do and my constant reminders of their idiocy, belittling, name calling and public humiliations do nothing to improve his or others like him abilities.

I must also make the confession I hate Paladins and although ninjing loot and sharding it in front of people is humorous it may may cause them to cry and inform their mother whose basement they are renting. From now on I will inform people I don't give a crap what they think so when I purposely ruin their day by making mine they will understand that I honestly don't care what they think of me.

I Gauss must also realize that some people are so far on the stupid end of things that they may actually believe standing in a fire is a buff and therefore must do my part to make them realize they are truly retarded.

I Gauss must also realize that sometimes people think I am kidding and must make sure I stress my points that "Everyone dismount" really means everyone dismount "Don't jump off the boat" means don't jump off the and beg for a summon in Stormwind. These are just two examples as I am sure that I can be more clear with in the future. I will now do my best to make the people who do these things cry for days at the amount of ridicule I along with everyone I instruct to give them for doing such things.

In closing I Gauss will continue to be who I am and treat those who are "special" in the way such people deserve to be treated. In addition I have to realize I am that awesome and make sure everyone realizes this fact before anything can be accomplished.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

What Your Flying Mount says

So as promised after all your constant bitching after the ground mounts her are my thoughts on flying mounts

No Epic Flying: There are not words to describe how much you fail. Yopu fail so much Bagellord is someone you look up to. You know where all the flight paths are because you use them! You are constantly made fun of for being last and if you actually arrive somewhere early you dismount and either show no mount or ride a ground mount you think is cool. Your not fooling anyone with this tatic, and worse of all you actually noticed they buffed the speed of non epic flying speed /facepalm

Wind Rider or Gryphon: So your level 80 and your riding this crap which was boring and dull at level 70. You obviously are boring and dumb for not realizing this. You ride a black war mammoth don't you?

Magic Carpet: So you are on a carpet. You enjoy disney movies don't you? we all know "magic carpet ride" is on everyone of your playlists isn't it? Too bad this carpet is the only carpet you will ever see

Nether Drake: So you spent time farming this rep so you could get a pretty little dragon. To bad its outdated and you wasted your time. No matter, no one believes that you had anything better to do with your time anyway.

Skyguard Mounts: You obviously have a sperm facination. This is either because a) you are living your sperms fantasy and actually seeing other people or b) Your a slut

Ashes of A'lar: No matter what you tell people they think your a ninja. So I suggest making up some crazy story macro it and tell it to everyone who asks. You will then become that guy who ninja'd Ashes and will be made WoW eternal. This might actually lead people to want to talk to you. But don't worry you still have no friends

Helicopter: Get to the chopper is not funny. It never was. You fail hardcore for ever thinking it was.

Green Proto: God dam eggs. Anyone who has this dream of throwing my Yolk at you every 6 days. At least I can get my frustration out on the Polar Bar girl somehow why not here!

Blue Proto: You have toll hacks and no one will ever go anywhere if you want something they do. Winning this mount has now cost you your ability to get groups until people forget where the mount came from of course.

Amber Drake: Grats to you for putting up with Arthas' slow ass in CoS. This mount is a joke to get and therefore if you think riding it shows off your L33t skills it just proves you have none. Please go fail more the fires to die in are on your right.

Twilight/Black Drake: You did sarth 3D and you think your awesome. We all know you were that idiot who died to a firewall or stood in a void zone. You then somehow were allowed to roll on the dam drake. We shall call you Champion of Failboat Admirals.

Red Proto: You wasted your time doing pointless achievements in heroics for a dam mount which is no quicker than any other crappy flying mount. You obviously have have too much time and are braggin about it. Let me guess you ride other cities ground mounts as well? Grats on wiping in real life.

DK Frost Worm: Your a DK you fail anyways riding this just proves the point further.

Raid Protos: You think you are full of win. You sit on your mount in Dalaran like your shit don't stink. When in truth you know it does since you shit your pants during last nights raid to avoid taking an afk. They are pixels and not lifetime achievement awards. Your mom needs your rent money by the way.

Arena Mount: You think people should bow before you greatness. You are a god among WoW players in your own eyes. We all know you play with some facerolling combo and requires little to no skill to be even remotely good. So grats on your pretty mount I am sure it will impress someone and you can explain your self proclaimed l33tness to them.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

The Return of Onyxia

So today is the day that we are given back on of the favourite raids of WoW. Now not everyone reading this was able to raid Onyxia in her prime and experience it in its true form. Now U assume everyone knows why this raid was made eternal if you don't I can only assume you have been living in a cave that somehow has access only to WoW. They say this is going to be puggable so I thought I would go over what you can expect to happen in an Onyxia pug

Leader: Odd groups got left, even groups got right. Group 5 is the whelp group

Random Idiot: Whats a whelp? And what group am I in?

Leader: DPS from the sides and don't get tail swiped.
following this statement some random moron decides to switch sides running through the tail and flys into the whelp cave. Wipe ensues. Follow by "many whelps" jokes.

When she takes off people fail at staying spread out and fireballs hit 5-8 people at once. Also this same idiots continue to stand in the fire like a bunch of morons and their only response is "I thought it buffed you"

Leader: Deep Breath incoming get to the sides
Every moron then proceeds to keyboard turn towards the sides and doesn't make it there in time and gets owned by the breath. Wipe ensues followed by More Dots and Sotp Dots jokes

Some idiot mage suggests that it would be easier to run through the whelp cave and kill them all before they spawn. Before waiting for the ok he already doing it. Wipe ensues and again with the many whelps jokes, along with the 50dkp minus

She Lands... and the tank being an idiot gets knock back into the whelp cave. Wipe ensues followed by run to the centre jokes, many whelps jokes and of course 50dkp minus jokes

When she lands like 3 warlocks instantly die for failing to stop dots and complain the tanks aggro sucks. Wipe ensues with stop dots jokes following it.

People fail to get back to the phase 1 positions and are feared into the whelp cave. Wipe ensues followed by 50DKP minus, MANY WHELPS LEFT SIDE EVEN SIDE, step away from the head Lee, and north corner jokes.

Some random idea gets feared into a tail swipe gets sent into the whelp cave. Wipe ensues followed by the 50dkp, many whelps, and north corner jokes.

Some pulls aggro she breaths on half the raid. Wipe ensues followed by 50DKP minus and "Your going to DPS very very slowly" jokes.

Someone pulls aggro and half the raid instead of getting breathed on gets tail swiped and sent into the whelp cave. Wipe ensues followed by 50dps minus, many whelps, and slow dps jokes.

So after like 21 pulls and 43 different people in the raid you finally killed the dam dragon.

Enjoy your Onyxia runs and since this is obviously a revamped and update Onyxia for level 80 I would also think the 50dkp minus fee should be raised as well.

I couldn't resist doing a post about this even if its dumb so screw all the haters!

Monday, September 21, 2009

How Brewfest Came To Be

So here I am thinking about this WoW holiday we all call Brewfest. When I thought how did they come up with such a interesting holiday. When I thought this would be an awesome idea for a post! So here is my take on it all

Billy: So we need some sort of holiday for the end of September.

Bob: Sounds good. What should it be?

Billy: Why don't we do something where if the people participate in the holiday events it makes it almost impossible to do anything else in the game.

Bob: What would be the purpose of that?

Billy: It would be fun to watch.

Bob: Oh so like watching a bunch of drunk people.

Billy: Oh my God that's it! We will get everyone drunk in everything they do!

Bob: ummm ok...

Billy: It will be like a two week keg party outside Orgrimmar and Ironforge.

Bob: Two weeks? Won't this get old after a couple days? I know getting drunk is fun and all, but how can we make it last for two weeks?

Billy: We will just make them farm something stupid with dailies and such, to buy I don't know clothes.

Bob: Clothes? Not everyone Role Plays like that. Seems pretty weak too just get clothes

Billy: Well its a big keg party, how about we add a mini keg?

Bob: Sounds good. What about we also add those Beer Goggles that make everyone hot that would be cool.

Billy: That's a retarded idea. But what the hell let's add them anyway.

Bob: Can't forget pets. There are always losers complaining there aren't enough pets.

Billy: Let's make it a rabbit with antlers.

Bob: umm why?

Billy: I don't know I am just making crap up. Make it a pink Elephant then is that ok with you?

Bob: There are no elephants in Warcraft.

Billy: Then make it whatever we call the dam Draenei mount.

Bob: an Elekk?

Billy: Ya that thing. Let's add them both. One then can buy, but my mutant thing can be a quest.

Bob: You really want to add a rabbit with antlers? What will we call it?

Billy: I don't know just mash head head on the keyboard and add "tinger" at the end.

Bob: Ok then. You know we could add a mini-boss could we not. That way we could add another daily.

Billy: You are brilliant. And you know what we could make him drop trinkets that are the same as the dam badge ones. We can just change the names to have something to do with Beer. They will be so busy doing all this crap they won't even notice.

Bob: Great Idea. But where should we put it?

Billy: The Bar in BRD of course.

Bob: Why there?

Billy: Because no one ever goes there anymore and it is so far from everything else it will piss those fools off even more.

Bob: Anything else?

Billy: Ya let's make him drop a couple of mounts with a super low drop rate. So they will be forced to come back everyday to try and get them. The best part is we can just reuse old models and change the names again!

Bob: May I suggest a Ram and a Kodo.

Billy: Awesome idea that way horde will want the ram and alliance the kodo. Those idiots will be farming that place all day. It will be great!

Bob: But how will we get them hooked on this in the first place?

Billy: Easy let's give them a free Mug to tap the kegs outside the cities. Everyone loves free beer.

Bob: That should work. May I suggest some drunken music or at least constant drunks rambling with looping music.

Billy: Great idea once again. Maybe we could add a Bar fight or something. Like every half hour and make it relate to BRD somehow.

Bob: They will just show up every half hour for a bar fight? They are just going to walk from BRD?

Billy: No they can come in Mole Machines.

Bob: What is a Mole Machine?

Billy: It's this thing that drills through the ground.

Bob: They are going to drill through BRD and end up at Orgrimmar and Ironforge every half hour? That doesn't even make any sense.

Billy: Who cares everyone will be drunk anyway.

Bob: So what are we going to call this holiday anyway?

Billy: We work at Blizzard. Let's do what we always do slightly change some other name and take all the credit and call it our own.

Bob: How about Octoberfest? Then the clothes would be easy to design and we can even throw some food in to relate to that to add to the party grounds.

Billy: Sounds like a plan. How about Brewfest.

Bob: I think you got a winner there. I'll get working on it right away.

And so Brewfest was born. Enjoy! You will see me celebrating walking around in my full garb and dual wielding my Unholy enchanted mugs and of course will most likely be by my mailbox

Sunday, September 20, 2009

That Tickles Me Wooden Leg

So I have to admit Pirate's Day is one of my favourite holidays in WoW. So what better way to celebrate it by doing a For The Horde all decked out in Pirate attire and then doing some Classic raids to finish it off. Let's go over some highlights of the day for those who weren't a part of the fun.

For The Horde

So not only was my constant bitching and complaining there along with the fair share of humiliation, but I did it all in Pirate Talk. Nothing like making fun of someone with Blimey!, No Quarter!, Scurvy Scum, and the good ole that tickles me wooden leg thrown in. Surprisingly I think this was the best DPS I have ever had in a For The Horde and I had like 9 low levels. So to raid leaders who want more DPS just do your raids all decked out as a pirate apparently it works. I know some people recorded this I assume it was pretty amusing to see 40 pirates killing bosses so if you did I'll be happy to throw it up on here to display it for everyone.

Classic Fun

So what do you do while bored on Pirate's Day? You do some classic raids and piss people off more. So we start with AQ40 went pretty well besides the fact I had to say everything on vent then type it out. Then no one understood what the hell I was saying because I had pirate speak on. Props to Khaotic for being my Pirate Translator that was rather amusing. Grats to all the morons that don't understand left and right. Left is the hand that makes an "L" like the Loser you are and your right hand is the one you jack off with looking at your Night Elf toon. Apparently we weren't fail enough to wipe on emps many because we had 40 people. Some dumbass DK rolled on a class item then complained he couldn't equip it. Maybe Bagellord paid for a name change who knows. It was on C'thun though when I put ML on and forgot to take it off when we headed to BWL.

First of all to all the Idiots who had no clue where BWL was I am sure Bagellord has room in his guild for you. So after I was pissed I left ML on for RG I realize I could have fun with it. There was this pally who was complaining level 80s were rolling on gear his level 63 ass could use. I never responded to him when he asked questions because everyone knows I don't answer questions. So when he won a roll on something on Vael I told everyone on vent I would ninja it and give it to him later just so everyone could hear him bitch and complain. Let's just say this then became a theme of the raid. I would let the pallys roll then ninja the item all to everyone on vents amusement. Let's also make a point that laughing at people in raids using Pirate Speak makes this even better. Grats to Kùsh who ended up getting the pally loot after the low level left and crying. He was ret and yet wanted the healing gear because he could use. Grats Darrius you are now on my always make fun of list. Even better was this tool's friend the Druid Waterbufflo I started to Ninja his stuff to because it was just to awesome to pass up. He died on Chromagus because I got him to pull the lever because he was "special" dam whoever rezzed him I wanted a raid wide teabag. Oh well maybe next time. So after complaining how I wanted to do Nef in the middle and not by the throne, because the failures without a cloak would be able to survive that way. What did you think I decided? Of course we did it in the middle and watched how like 2/3 of the raid died. Is it wrong that I was happy at the mass casualties?

So what next? MC of course. Apparently some people in this group were so fail they needed a summon from BWL to MC. Yes they asked for a summon. Kùsh I don't believe you that you were "afk" so no point in replying! So when I entered MC I stood back and watch NJ tank it in Boomkin when Khaotic summoned me like 10ft up in the instance when I got the brilliant idea to RP a cripple. I would not take a step the entire instance and would be summoned from place to place to loot. Yes we actually did this, who else could get 21 summons in a raid besides me for just simple amusement? Of course I went on to Ninja pally loot even with the cry baby gone because it was now the theme and yet everyone still rolled which was also funny. To all who didn't know MC still drops hunter loot I think that bastard applebottoms got like a full set in one run. I actually got to DPS Rag though as I was summoned beside him before this boss pull at least I helped clear the instance I also felt like I wasn't doing anything purposeful. Not that I cared anyway, and even got a summon so I could take the mage portal back to Dalaran oh yes that was full of win besides all the dam pally gear that was in my bags.

Anyways that was the Pirates Day fun. Until next year when I have to figure out a way to top it. Again if you have videos of any of it would be glad to post it so those who weren't part of the epic raids get a chance to see it all.

Now how can we have fun during Brewfest...

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Guild Names

So whats in a guild name? I basically tells you everything you need to know about the guild. So I would thought I would comment on some guild names I have come across and then throw out some suggestions for people looking to start a new one.

Lets start with the existing ones

[Lincoln Wiped on Opera] props to Lastshot on this one. This name is full of win and wish I came up with it myself.

[Me so Hordie] I have seen this one around must be full of 15 year old boys who will live in their parents basement till they are 45.

[Kill It Till It's Dead] I think the people who made this guild are confused at what "dead" means.

[Special Kind of Stupid] Abtal asked to use my phrase for this guild while I was using it on our pal Bagellord during a For the Horde run. At least now he will know he will live on forever.

[Pi Crit Trade] this gets Gauss' Approval.

Submit some you may have seen around I may have missed. Now for my own ideas

[Ret Pallys Anonymous] This guild would be for alts of ret pallys where they all could bitch and complain to each other without fear of persecution. Kùsh has offered to write a 12 step program for this guild. See him for details.

[Protectors of Silvermoon] This guild's point is obvious. Although I don't think you would be able to get any signatures.

[Horde for Life] this would be an alliance guild.

[AFK Mom's Calling] This guild would be the perfect place for people using the titles "Champion of the Frozen Wastes" or "Jenkins"

[Nagas Belong in Slave Pens] I would just be curious how fast blizzard disbanded this.

[No One Key] This guild would be for Mages. Since they forget to switch their keybinds before they break their "1" key

[Clickers and Keyboard Turners] This would be a guild for people who obviously fail since they have no idea why clicking and keyboard turning is bad.

[Bloodelf Refugees] keep all those dam blood elves in one place. This guild could also go by the names [Sword Fighters] or [Pretty in Pink]

[The Way Things Should Be] all female toons in this guild would have to be tailors and cooks

[Turncoat Failures] this is for faction transfers who can't get in a guild. At least you all will have something to talk about.

Friday, September 18, 2009

What the Mount You Ride Says

Will start with ground and will doing flying another day. Also if you are one of those people that chills on your mount pretending to be afk please look back at the "things that bother me" section.

Black War Bear: Proud member of the Gauss Nation. This mount doesn't look that bad, but there are lots around thanks to yours truly. So its like driving a Toyota Camry not that bad of a car but not too original either. You are what we call a follower

Armored Brown Bear: Who the Hell rides this thing? I assume people with the "Champion of the Frozen Wastes" title enjoy this mount. You fail ride something else.

Zulian Tiger: I know you yell "BY THE POWER OF GREYSKULL" every time you mount it. This mount may look cool but I know you only ride it so people whisper you and ask where you got it. Let's be clear this doesn't mean you have friends.

Amani War Bear: This doesn't mean your awesome, it means your living in the past. You probably are the person that reads their high school yearbook daily if only it actually had comments in it.

Your Races Mount: You have no friends just face it.

Another Races Mount: You have too much time and yet you want to broadcast this to everyone.

Any Hawkstrider: You look like a dumbass. You also probably wear Crocs in real life since you are so used to looking like an idiot.

Talbuk: You are on this mount because you think it looks elegant and high class. Think again its a goat.

Black War Mammoth: Face it your riding this because obviously you have nothing better. Everyone has this mount because it is a joke to get. You are so full of fail you might as well have rolled a ret pally.

Traveler's Tundra Mammoth: You just wasted 16000g on a mount. Do I really need to say anything else?

White Polar Bear: I hate you go die in a fire.

Zhevra: You want people to think you actually have friends. Sorry your not fooling anyone.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

What Kind of WoW Player Are You?

Today I felt like describing the many different types of WoW players. This will not only be Informative, but as always entertaining

Noob: You could be new to the game and there have an excuse for being completely useless and utterly horrible. If you are not new on the other hand you are not only useless and horrible but the laughing stock of everyone around. Please see the dictionary under Bagellord for more information.

Scrub: You are pretty bad at everything you do. You wipe in 10 man Naxx for being unable to understand the concept of the safety dance. You also rely on the fact you get marks and points for losing BGs and Arenas. You are on moron for being proud of your horrible gear because you have 2 pieces of T8 which can be bought from a vendor...

Dreamer: You sit in Dalaran inspecting people hoping to be apart of bigger and better things instead of your worthless Warcraft existence. You constantly apply to guilds above your level and either are openly mocked for doing so or are completely ignored. You always use the line "If only I had your gear" at least 10 times daily. Words of advice from Gauss Stop crying or reroll a Ret Pally at least then people will understand where your bitching comes from.

The Dumbass: There are the people that have no reason why they are so horrible. They do like 1k DPS, fail at pally tanking, or have no idea how to roll HoTs as a druid. They are really beyond help but do provide some comic relief.

Raider: You raid weekly do your crap get your epics and are not that horrible of a player. The problem is your guild is horrible and can hardly progress through any content. Raiders are often dreamers but they differ in the fact they never apply to other guilds for the fact they are afraid of failure. Sorry but your already there.

Failboat Admiral: You sir are an idiot. You are that moron that dies in a fire, gets shot by a laser point right at you, or jumps off the boat on the way to Stormwind. You also somehow manage to do these things more than Once. You are like a Noob that has squeaked through the cracks. Learn your place in the world and go play Halo

Captain Obvious: You are that guy on vent that never shuts up or just repeats everything just to hear your own voice. You are the first person people notice is not around because they are actually able to concentrate. Do us all a favour and destroy your headset.

PvP "God": You are the self proclaimed greatest player ever. You tell everyone how to win BGs by constantly yelling at them. If only you realized they never will listen. You brag about your arena ratings even though you got carried by OP combos or glitches, but that doesn't matter because you got "insert title" in "insert season" so you obviously are full of awesome....Sorry but no.

Hardcore Raider: You are the best around. Have full tier got all hardmodes on farm. Life is great. Oh wait it isn't. Your spouse left, you got fired, and you ran out of redbull. At least you have awesome gear....

Gauss: Sorry there can only be One

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

You Play WoW Too Much If....

  • When watching TV with family or friends you say "be right back bio"
  • You press your push to talk button when talking to people in the same room
  • When someone fails to signal while changing lanes you roll down your window and tell them to "learn to play"
  • You organize your fridge and closet like they are your bags
  • When someone takes something from you, you proceed to tell everyone around they are a Ninja
  • You tell people your a Teepee and are confused when no one says they are a Wigwam
  • You have a cat named Illidan
  • You ask someone out by saying "Looking for 1 More Dinner and a Movie"
  • Your honeymoon is set to happen at Blizzcon
  • You plan your appointments to happen during Tuesday Maintenance
  • Your sexual roleplaying consists of Arthas and Jaina fantasies
  • When you go to get your car fixed you complain how much cheaper the repair would have been if it were cloth
  • You discuss strat before entering a shopping mall
  • When your doctor sends you to a specialist you call him a Noob for not maxing his Profession
  • When talking to a clerk at a store you ask him the iLevel of what he is trying to sell you
  • Your excuse for not going to your in-laws is "your not attuned"

    and finally...
  • You bought a piccolo so people will dance with you

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

The Mailbox

So Kùsh asked me yesterday why I seem to be standing beside the mailbox for quite a bit of time. So today I decided I would share with you all the reason. I will write what the mail was and say my thoughts upon reading it

ok so these first few are boring just disenchant crap from guildies. I will use this time to bitch. I hate you all for thinkin I have nothing better to do than DE all this crap of yours. What the hell you want Dream Dust for anyway. One day I am just going let it sit in the box and rot.

"Gauss can i have some gold i know you won't miss it"
Go to hell

"My friend says you gave him some gold to help him with his flying I could really use that 5000g to get my flying as well"
Your friend is a liar. Only failures don't have epic flying.

"Hey Gauss they were talking about you in trade today thought I would let you know"
are you new to Llane? Your filling my mailbox with crap I already know

"gauss I lost your blog address could you send it to me"
First off my name gets a capital and secondly Favourite you moron.

"Gauss you awesome I heard you have a lot of gold...."
ok cutting it off there and just deleted it. Who cares if he wasn't going to ask that crap pisses me off

"Gauss I need to be in Three Score you guys are great i will be 80 by the weekend"
This guy obviously is full of fail and doesn't have a clue

"Gauss trade chat is lacking Pi today you should give them some. btw your blog is great!"
Hold a sec while I put Pi in trade chat

"Are you doing For the Horde today, message me if you do"
Let's be clear I don't message people or hold spots or none of that crap. Pay attention for when the dam invites happen and get it then. Also For The Horde is Fri-Sun not on Tuesday you dumbass

"Can you mention me in your blog?"
Who the Hell are you?

"I have a warrior question. Can I ask you about it when you are online?"
Everyone knows I don't answer questions. Where has this guy been?

"Are you really Gauss?"
Are you really that Stupid?

"Do you really have that much gold?"
Do you really think I will give you any?

"My buddy told me about you. I read your blog I was pissing my pants"
Obviously you weren't paper trained

"Can you take me on one of your guilds raids?"
Sure if you sit outside the entire time and never do anything

"What are you recruiting"
Learn to read the website you idiot

"You really think your better than everyone?"
Not everyone but certainly you

"Can I add you to my friends list?"
this isn't Facebook you moron

"I wanted to tell you I ignored you today for spamming"
And I see you are very proud. Did you want a cookie?

"You are the King of Llane"

"I posted an application to your guild get back to me plz if there is any questions"
yay wonder if this idiot has 71 points in frost

And the box is empty. So please if you see me standing next to a mailbox in Dalaran you now can feel the pain I am going through each and every day.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Guess There Always is a First Time

So yesterday was the first time that a failed For The Horde raid has happened. This wasn't because the DPS was awful, or because the healers were a special kind of stupid, or the fact that I had the normal 8 people under level 80. For every raid has all of these things and even though I bitch, complain, humiliate and constantly make fun of everyone in every raid we somehow get the Job done because no matter how retarded the people are they listen. Then when its all said and done they go and pickup WoW's version of the Toyota Camry that being the Black War Bear.

That simple instruction yesterday somehow got lost and some idiot refused to follow the plan. Of course I expect that retarded things will happen like people jumping off boats or running up stairs during the pull at Exodar(I still hope no one will do this). These little things I can deal with for they don't ruin the raid for everyone who put the time in, and also gives some comic relief to the whole run. I may sound like there is a vein popping out of the my head, but it does amuse me.

So why did this raid fail? Everything was going pretty much to script the raid was summoned and chilling in the cave and I logged over to check the Kings room as always. The room is pretty much empty besides the 5 or so people chilling there, but that's pretty normal. So I log back over with the good news. Then we are introduced to Hailstone. Yes I know I don't normally use names, but this guy obviously is a moron. Bagellord looks like a champ compared to him. Anyways I log back to find him outside the cave and no where near the group, and when he finally gets back to the group he was followed back by a few alliance who have now discovered the entire raid. So obviously to him "Stay in the God Dam Cave in the back corner" meant something like go round up all the alliance you can see and show them where we are and telling them to be ready. So let's just say the raid got pretty owned upon entering the city. Hailstone has now been dubbed "the Champion of Stupidity" His excuse of course was he was stealth and couldn't be seen.... yet he was followed back....Do I even have to tell you he was a blood elf?

So yes it was bound to happen sooner or later, but I would have preferred it to happen not because some dumbass messed it up for everyone else. Let Hailstone live to be the Champion of Stupidity as I am sure the Gauss Nation will never let him live down the shame he has brought.

I promise I won't be so serious tomorrow this just had to be said. Maybe I will throw something else up tonight to make up for it. Again thank you all for the support and even though I said yesterday that was the end of the runs next Friday I will start them up again. So be ready to kick some ass again!

Sunday, September 13, 2009

People who Ignore me

Honestly I don't know what it is about people that they think it is going to scar me for life by ignoring me. It;s even better when they announce it to everyone like it is their greatest accomplishment. So you don't like Pi? Do you think I care? You didn't ask for my opinion, but I am still going to give it to you. So go ahead and ignore me mark it on your calendar, bake yourself a cake make sure you put some candles on it to show you are that proud of yourself, but don't think for a second that it will change anything I say or do. Because the truth is I care about as much about what you think as the crap I flush down the toilet every morning.

One thing I always find funny is when people have ignored me and then find out they need me for something. Be it and invite to one of the Epic For The Horde runs or to craft something they can get from no one but me. Maybe its cruel but I laugh endlessly when they keep asking and I keep telling them they are a retard for ignoring me. Especially when I told them it would happen when they were so proud of ignoring me.

I also love the awkward moments when we invite someone to the guild or they are an app and they have me ignored. I give them a hard time about how they are applying to a guild where they have a guild leader ignored, but its all in good fun. But truthfully its not a really good idea to be ignoring the guy reviewing your application for future reference.

So if your there and someone says they are ignoring me or they are going to ignore me if I keep it up. Just do as I do laugh at them, because it makes my day to piss people off.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Trade Chat fun

Oh Trade chat what a wonderful thing sometimes. I wonder if trading actually gets done. I always enjoy trade chat so I thought I would share my top 10 ways to have fun in Trade Chat.

10)Tell people where the CAPS LOCK button is

9)Complain about people telling tradewhat items they put on the auction house.

8)Linking random item(better if its grey) and say your selling it for 5000g. for instance WTS [Feeble Sword] 5000g

7)Making up random guilds and asking for sigs or invites. Most importantly when doing this is the mention that the guild has a Tabard

6)Offering to Tank or DPS anyone who asks. When they whisper or invite you answer all their questions in trade. Be sure to ask for insane amounts of gold so you don't actually get invited to the group.

5)Pick a random person talking thaat won't shutup and make fun of them with answering anything they say or just ask they random questions.

4)When people are talking about doing Naxx try to convince them out of doing it. Make sure you are serious with your answers because they will probably be so clueless they would believe you.

3)Low ball peoples items they are trying to sell and go on and on about how the item will never sell for as much as they want it to. If you do this enough be careful you might actually have to buy it if they are that stupid.

2)Inform people that they can learn to speak common. If you didn't know there is a mountain in the barrens south of North Watch. All you have to do is climb it and the NPC will ask you for 1000g to learn to speak it. When about 10 people believe you and head to the barrens make sure you rely the whispers about not being able to climb the mountain to everyone still in Trade.

1) Of course give the people what they want PI and whole lot of it

Friday, September 11, 2009

You Fail at WoW if...

1)You're a Blood Elf
2)You're a ret pally if your both then...well...
3)you don't have enough DPS for 10 man Naxx
4)You don't have epic flying at 80...This is even worse if you have a mount you can't even ride
5)You ask where a mailbox is in Dalaran
6)You're in a guild called "Special Kind of Stupid"
7)You jump off the boat on the way to Stormwind
8)You use the title "Champion of the Frozen Wastes"
9)The Yeti hits you in the Northern Beasts encounter
10)You died in a fire
11)You think tanking fire walls is fun
12)You think a void zone is a place your supposed to dance on
13)You are missing a Flight Path
14)You ask me what "Vent" is
15)You have to ask your mom if its ok to do another pull
16)You use green gems in epic gear
17)"Super" is anywhere in your name
18)A twink is your main
19)Better yet if you play a twink
20)You're a hunter without ammo
21)You think Barrens Chat is engaging conversation
22)You protect Silvermoon
23)You have a Night Elf named after Orlando Bloom
24)You have no idea why "Many Whelps" is funny

and finally you know you fail at WoW if

25) you DC yourself after you screw up so you can say you DC'd

Things people do that bug me

This title is pretty obvious add your own because I know everyone has something

Chilling on their mounts pretending to be afk

Yes I see your mount. Do you want a cookie? Do you want me to tell you that your awesome? Honestly your not your just a little too proud of your pixels and have now crossed the line from gamer to all out loser. So if you want grats for that I will by all means give them to you.

Blocking a flight master or a mailbox

You sir obviously have no life. You logged on to a video game and then proceeded to bother people. You obviously have no friends and the only way people will talk to you is if they are telling you to get the hell out of the way. You are just so full of fail your mom isn't even proud of you.

The level 8 that asks me for gold to respec

First off your level 8 how the hell do you respec. Think of a better excuse for begging. If it is better i may ever say i will will pay you to jump off Thunderbluff and kill yourself, and then enjoy laughing at you will you are whispering me asking for the gold for doing it. You are even higher on the fail meter than the mailbox guy.

Low levels asking in trade to be run through instances

Learn to play the game you retard. You are the reason there are level 80s doing 1k DPS. You are one of the major reasons people fail at WoW. Go die in a fire please!

People asking me for mount money

Yes I have gold and I probably wouldn't even miss the 5000g for your epic flying, but I still am not going to give it to you. Learn to play the game and farm your own dam gold and don't look for handouts or you will become the level 8 asking for respec money

People who say they put obvious crap on the Auction House

Really you put a gem on the AH along with the other 200 of them and you felt the need to inform the entire server of this useless act. Please God stop you are making people dumber by the second

Gold Sellers spam in cities

Ok we got the picture you sell gold and you probably hacked the account you are spamming on. The only people with more fail than you are the ones who actually respond to those adds.

People who misspell my name

It's Gauss not Guass pleae don't insult me or yourself read a dam book and find out who the namesake is if you don't believe me. If you don't know what a namesake is might as well look that up to moron.