Wednesday, September 23, 2009

What Your Flying Mount says

So as promised after all your constant bitching after the ground mounts her are my thoughts on flying mounts

No Epic Flying: There are not words to describe how much you fail. Yopu fail so much Bagellord is someone you look up to. You know where all the flight paths are because you use them! You are constantly made fun of for being last and if you actually arrive somewhere early you dismount and either show no mount or ride a ground mount you think is cool. Your not fooling anyone with this tatic, and worse of all you actually noticed they buffed the speed of non epic flying speed /facepalm

Wind Rider or Gryphon: So your level 80 and your riding this crap which was boring and dull at level 70. You obviously are boring and dumb for not realizing this. You ride a black war mammoth don't you?

Magic Carpet: So you are on a carpet. You enjoy disney movies don't you? we all know "magic carpet ride" is on everyone of your playlists isn't it? Too bad this carpet is the only carpet you will ever see

Nether Drake: So you spent time farming this rep so you could get a pretty little dragon. To bad its outdated and you wasted your time. No matter, no one believes that you had anything better to do with your time anyway.

Skyguard Mounts: You obviously have a sperm facination. This is either because a) you are living your sperms fantasy and actually seeing other people or b) Your a slut

Ashes of A'lar: No matter what you tell people they think your a ninja. So I suggest making up some crazy story macro it and tell it to everyone who asks. You will then become that guy who ninja'd Ashes and will be made WoW eternal. This might actually lead people to want to talk to you. But don't worry you still have no friends

Helicopter: Get to the chopper is not funny. It never was. You fail hardcore for ever thinking it was.

Green Proto: God dam eggs. Anyone who has this dream of throwing my Yolk at you every 6 days. At least I can get my frustration out on the Polar Bar girl somehow why not here!

Blue Proto: You have toll hacks and no one will ever go anywhere if you want something they do. Winning this mount has now cost you your ability to get groups until people forget where the mount came from of course.

Amber Drake: Grats to you for putting up with Arthas' slow ass in CoS. This mount is a joke to get and therefore if you think riding it shows off your L33t skills it just proves you have none. Please go fail more the fires to die in are on your right.

Twilight/Black Drake: You did sarth 3D and you think your awesome. We all know you were that idiot who died to a firewall or stood in a void zone. You then somehow were allowed to roll on the dam drake. We shall call you Champion of Failboat Admirals.

Red Proto: You wasted your time doing pointless achievements in heroics for a dam mount which is no quicker than any other crappy flying mount. You obviously have have too much time and are braggin about it. Let me guess you ride other cities ground mounts as well? Grats on wiping in real life.

DK Frost Worm: Your a DK you fail anyways riding this just proves the point further.

Raid Protos: You think you are full of win. You sit on your mount in Dalaran like your shit don't stink. When in truth you know it does since you shit your pants during last nights raid to avoid taking an afk. They are pixels and not lifetime achievement awards. Your mom needs your rent money by the way.

Arena Mount: You think people should bow before you greatness. You are a god among WoW players in your own eyes. We all know you play with some facerolling combo and requires little to no skill to be even remotely good. So grats on your pretty mount I am sure it will impress someone and you can explain your self proclaimed l33tness to them.

3 comments:

  1. But I worked hard for my mount :(

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  2. Epic flying is expensive its understandable not to have it

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