Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Your Point in Life and Its Link to WoW

So Sx gave me this idea a couple days ago and it intrigued me. Why you may ask? It would be an idea which would basically offend everyone in some way or another. So obviously this is great in every way possible.

13 and Under: Your a dam kid who sits at a computer endlessly and never goes outside. You are obviously overweight and your only friend is your cat which hisses at you whenever you are near it. You have to constantly go afk to check your blood sugar, and fill up your bowl of who knows what that your seemingly non existent parents left you with. I would say you play WoW because your life sucks, which is obviously true, but sadly I am pretty sure someone like you has a much worse WoW experience.

High school Student: You think you are it and everyone who knows you doesn't have the heart to tell you, you're a failure. The only people you talk to also play WoW and are impressed at how you were able to clear Naxx. Because you think you know best about everything you rolled a ret pally because "they own". Is it any wonder that you have a night dancing as a screen saver who keeps you company at night?

University Student: So you finally moved away from home(Well maybe you could be a mama's boy/girl) and are out on your own. But yet you are doing the samething you did at home sit in front of the computer screen and play WoW. You are though finally pumped you don't have your mother screaming at you to go to bed and thankfully don't have to make up any more excuses as to why you dc'd again during the raid the previous night. If only you actually talked to someone who wasn't 0's and 1's.

Out of School Live Alone: Your only room that appears to be lived in is the one with the computer in it. Everything else is spotless besides the dust. Your meals are all microwaved which is actually located at the end of your desk so you don't have to get up. Fridge you say? Well that's on the floor on the other side of the desk. The last time you saw a "friend" was when you went to Gamespot to buy your Game Card and the guy remembered your name. Don't worry one day you will meet someone who isn't connected to the game....well here is hoping for you.

You're Married or Close to it: So you live with someone. Maybe I should say grats because its not your parents and this would be a huge accomplishment for a WoW player. If they play the game you probably met on the Internet somehow and are basically two very creepy or messed up people. If both remind me never to get caught with you in a dark place. Anyways, if not then there was a time when you were "normal" or at least appeared to be. The other person constantly reminds you of these times and wants the person they married back. If he/she hasn't left you they will just give it sometime. This could have all been avoided you know if you didn't turn down sex for them purples.

Oh No You Have Kids: This is awful if you both play because I am getting this vision off them locked in a cage or on leashes. If its just you then what I said above happens when you are alone with them. Remind me to call social services if anyone owns up to that. When they kids start wanting to play its when you get the question "You are going to have to choose Warcraft or your life?" you look right at them and your response is as follows "and if Warcraft is my life?".

You're Retired: This just screams Pedo. You are playing a game with a bunch of people significantly younger than you some of which are children. You hang out with them, joke with them, and log on everyday to do the same. You honestly think this is ok? Try going to a playground doing the same things and see how fast someone calls the cops.

Hate mail can be sent to me as always. Remember I will always respond to hate mail because I have fun making you hate me even more. Enjoy!


  1. Don't we all put kids in cages?

  2. So you just described 99% of warcraft players. Of course I am not included in those players. :P


  3. Lolololol.

    That's great, Keep 'em coming Gauss. :D

    /agree with Boggle.