Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Ya That's Bad

So today I decided to go off on something that bugs me more than useless socket humping and doing all the bosses in Old Kingdom combined. Most people who do this don't even understand why it is so bad. They think it is perfectly ok and everyone does it. You see when you think this way this is when you have to admit you have a problem. It's like alcoholics who think it is ok to drink that bottle all by themselves at 10am. Or the addict who is searching for something to sell so they can satisfy their fix. So the question is what am I referring to? Well it is very simple. Clickers and Keyboard turners.

Now if you read this and thought here Gauss goes telling people how to play, but that is not it at all. If you were hoping around on one leg when you had two, well you would be a dumbass and I would tell you. You see there are many ways to play this just isn't one of them. Let's throw tab targeting into the mix as well. Awful don't do it. Why not throw walking backwards when something is chasing you and going to kill you. Would you do that in real life when someone is running at you with a giant axe? Of course not. So why do it in WoW, other than the fact that you are just that special kind of stupid.

Back on topic. Let's start with Clickers. You see when you click on the buttons on your action bars. You are not only wasting time by moving your mouse over to click on such and such when you could just push the damn button, which is actually pretty significant amount of time over the course of a fight. This isn't even the main problem. The problem is simple when you are moving your mouse around looking for that button to to click on you are NOT looking at the rest of your screen. Meaning you could be in fire, poison, blue crap, green shit, or don't see a giant yeti is running right at you. Now I know what you clickers are thinking, it is only for a second. That's the same line that guy said when he turn around to face the back seat to find a damn CD only to crash into the damn car ahead of him. Only for a second...

Keyboard turning. Well this is just special nothing like taking 3 seconds to turn around and run from something. Too bad it already caught up to you and you exploded wiping half the raid. Did I do that? Of course you did you moron. Your mouse is a wonderful thing you know it can turn you around instantly and you can get out of the way. It will make people happy, it will make me happy. So please lets make this right.

So everyone please help me get this message through to all those special people. Let them see the error of their ways. Who knows maybe we can have a rehab program to help these people.

I think I can breathe now, I feel much better.


  1. Did Gauss compare being a clicker to an alcoholic? LOL


  2. ROFL that was so awesome I can't even compare it to anything. Damn the clickers and keyboard turners

  3. I love how you can make anything sound horrible. I am laughing so hard right now I can't even begin to explain. You compared clickers and keyboard turners to drug addicts and it made sense. You then gave the greatest explanations of why not to do it. This is one to put in the win column for a very long time. Post of the year so far.

  4. ROFL you sir win the internet

  5. one of the best things I have ever read. Still laughing and will be for a quite some time.

  6. I agree you win the internet

  7. Three Score will be disbanding and reforming as

    "Gauss' Army of Dick Riders"

  8. @Llanehatesyou

    That's a really strong argument you put forth there bro, but there's always room for improvement. You should take a look at There's a neat little digram on there that I think you'll enjoy. You can thank me later.